xoxoxxo

2009-02-21T11:37:00.002+08:00

hello guys!:) hope you've all had a blast with CNY and VDAY!:)
i did:) kinda:)

and yes, i'm finally shifting to livejournal, after so long! been using blogger since my early sec days=/

so goodbye laggy slow blogger, and hello lj!:)

i hope (crosses fingers) with a new blog agent, i'll update mroe regularly!:)

here's the new link: http://kaela-bella.livejournal.com

ps: anyone who's a whitz with templates, please help me out!:)

xoxo kaela '09!

2009-01-05T13:21:00.002+08:00

school's resuming in a couple of days!=(

ytd was my parent's 23rd anniversary, we had fish and co at the old jp, and shopped aound the new jp! it's HUGE!yay many more shopping days ahead:)

and yay the bf will be back tdy, after 3 long long weeks! and to think in the whole span of time, we only had 1 very brief phone call! and veryvery limited textes=/ hopefully we'll get to meet later:)

oh yup as for smoothie updates, i've just made a strawberry, papaya and banana milkshake! veryvery rich and yummy:) and healthy too!:) haha i want to be a smoothie connoisseur! went out grocery shopping tdy to buy more strawberries, blueberries, kiwi, juice and yoghurt:)

okays, off to do more packing! :)

2009-01-01T01:41:00.003+08:00

happy 2009 to all!

so quickly another year has passed and we have all aged!

hmmm i'm thinking of switching to livejournal, will fix a day to move my blog:)

okays my new year's resolutions!

1) to love God wholeheartedly
2) to settle down in a church
3) to concentrate on my studies and do well
4) practise my piano well for the exams
5) pick up driving
6) work out at least once every 2 weeks (aim very low alr! haha!)
7) be a more dedicated tutor
8) to learn how to cheer people up
9) to spend more time understanding the bf
10) to spend more time with family and friends
11) to save more money

hmmm, i'll add more wheni can think of more~

counted doown(somesort) in this church near my new house.. well we didn'tcount! we were pray ing and the moment we 'amen'ed, it was the new year! haha

but they remind me of chc. very enthu people, want me to join their youth minsitry and be number 54! haha see how lah

i'm sleepy! oh yah on the sidethought, the first thing i ate this year was a mcflurry! haha! so unhealthy!

2008-12-25T23:49:00.003+08:00

who loves TWILIGHT? *raises hand!*

i especially love BELLA'S SONG.
there are 2 versions of it, one for the movie, and one that was a potential piece called river flows in you, but both are beautiful!

the soulful melodies pull at my heartstrings, the piano chimes the music's meaning in a deep and purposeful manner.. brings tears to my eyes, music can be so, so , beautiful.

somewhere once, i heard this,
"you never give up on your music, ever."
i agree. without music, life would be so empty.

i'm gg to learn to play both versions:)

here are the links to both songs!
1) actual : http://www.getalyric.com/listen/NNp0Tg4T43M/twilight_bella_s_lullaby_latest_sheet_music

2) river flows in you version:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zQME-ChSwNM&feature=related

which do you think is nicer? haha personally i think the river flows in you version is nicer, but the actual one suit the theme of the movie better:)

if you want the mp3s or scoresheets leave a tag with your email add, i'll send you:)

loves:)

2008-12-24T20:11:00.002+08:00

"sometimes God breaks our spirit to save our soul, sometimes He breaks our heart to make us whole, sometimes he send us pain so we can be stronger, sometimes he sends us failure so we can be humble"

happy birthday Jesus, thanks for saving me 2008 years ago, though i dont really deserve it.

when my world was in darkness

You spoke Your work, night turned into day, Your beauty filled this place

when my world stood in silence

You filled my heart with songs that never end, forever i will praise

to think the universe could not withold Your glory,

You choose to live in me

i'm so amazed

and i, worship You, Lord

my life in You restored

here is my heart, make it Your sanctuary

for nobody else but Jesus only You

thanksgiving.

thank you Lord.

some days i just feel so depressed i dont know what i'm doing or holding on for.. sometimes i feel like throwing in the towel and just stop caring. sometimes i just want to shut myself in some deep hole or migrate to a foreign land to spend my life in nature and seclusion.

told a friend ytd: 'i'd rather be sing gle and envy sweet couples, then be attached but still envy sweet couples'

i dont know what's wrong, i dont know how to make things right. sometimes i feel like i can fight it out and jump the obstacle bars,sometimes i simply wonder if what i'm doing is the best way for us, or if i'm acting on a purely selfish instinct. yet to try to be maganimous and let go would seem weak and undertermined, and you'd say i' m not trying to solve the problem but rather, am running from it.

running's easier.

this holidays i've beemn working my ass off, but i've also been blessed with the good fortune of meeting up with friends i havent seen in ages. my jc friends at timbre, at sun and moon tdy, niger, wei xuan, gret, gary, jo, and of course my darlings qiu liy le eunice..

but here i am, spending christmas eve at my desk blogging, listening to the rain, alone.

i sound like some emo freak=/

sigh.. i'm just tired.. some alone time would be good..maybe i need a year of alone time.

in any case, tmr is Jesus' bday. for His sake, i'll end on a good note.

so i'll rmb, all those times You've brought me through

i'll be a fool to give up cause the goal is near

i'll move on, i'll hold on,

Lord i will take your hand and You will guide me along, weather the storm

so i say, come what may

i'll hold on to Your hope

and i will walk down this road, in hopes it will take me back home

2008-12-18T23:49:00.002+08:00

'when you're gone, the pieces of my heart are missing you, when you're gone, the face i came to know is missing too, when you're gone the words i need to hear will always get me through the day, and make it okay, i miss you' :(

i have furniture!

very ugly wood furniture from scanteak! i'm not crazy ver it but it functions and looks sensible so oh wells, it has to be. but now, i can sit on a chair ewith a table to type this! instead of on the floor and propping the lappie on my bed or a carton! lols:)

been woking everyday like mad!:(

cause christmas timae and our shop is very shophanded!=/ but i've been learning alot of new things so very happy:) like opening,mid shift and closing~! and for the first timne, i'm actually holding the master key to the shop overnight! will be opening the store tmr!:) yays!:)

next week's christmas!

havent done xmas shopping cause i'bve been soso busy!!:(

oh wells, need to slp early!

2008-12-08T21:23:00.001+08:00

a most beautiful song i hear at work everyday!! from disney toy story sountrack!

When she loved me
Sarah mc lachlan

When somebody loved me, everything was beautiful
Every hour we spent together, lives within my heart
And when she was sad, I was there to dry her tears
And when she was happy, so was i, when she loved me.

Through the summer and the fall, we had each other, that was all
Just she and I together, like it was meant to be
And when she was lonely, I was there to comfort her
And I knew that she loved me.

So the years went by, I stayed the same
And she began to drift away, I was left alone
Still I waited for the day, when she'd say "i will always love you."
Lonely and forgotten, never thought she'd look my way,
She smiled at me and held me, just like she used to do,
Like she loved me, when she loved me

When somebody loved me, everything was beautiful,
Every hour we spent together, lives within my heart
When she loved me.

2008-11-27T23:42:00.002+08:00

i miss you my darlings!!

2008-11-23T22:52:00.002+08:00

havent blogged in ages!!

yay i just got my internet back!!!

exams are over!!

much to celebrate:)

went timbre last friday with my jc friends! gosh i love that place:) ah will upload pics soon! lazylazy! haha!

been eatingalot, watching movies alot, shopping abit, working abit, tuitionting here and there, and oh, rolling alot on my new bed!! haha i love my new house now:) cause i got more space! except got to keep walng up and down lo=/ but nvm, can exercise and buirn calories!

oh yah

i've been transferred to plaza sing also! kinda miss suntec! but this transfer means i got direct bus, means i take abt half the time to get to work!! yay!!:) cause no need to take long long walk! but gret resigned alr:(

tdy made new friends there! people there very nice also! oh and there was a 25 pax party!! haha was kinda crazy!!=/

oh wells update again next time!

2008-10-16T22:39:00.002+08:00

i feel like my mind's exploding. and my lungs.

been sick for about 3 days, it hurts everytime i sneeze and it bleeds and bleeds and the blood clots and then it bleeds again=/ and when i cough my lungs ache seemingly worse than a habitual smoker.

and i have to pack cartons upon cartons for the shifting. in tune to my mum's incessant nagging.

and i have exams coming up next week and i have no idea what i'm doing.

and i have to help with his O's and i feel bad i'm so ooccupied i can't spend enough time and energy, i do so want him to do well!

my students have not-so-fabulous results, i'm going to have to restructure the whole tutoring system. next year i will have 1 sec 2 boy, 2 sec 3 girls and 1 graduating O level girl. so much thinking and planning to do. i'm worried for them..

the customer is giving me a constant headache with her demands. as much as i try to please her, i can't..

i mailed out 2 packages to the wrong add and now i have to remail with registered postage.

i've been requested by 1 friend to help another apparently distressed friend, who happens to be my friend too, and i have no time to spare..

no dating time.

i have to source for certain materials in town or c town and i have no time.

i have no proper mailing add yet so i can't get parcels sent to me.

i will have no internet connection when i shift so i have no idea how i'm gna correspond with customers.

i will have many many banglas in my house for another week.

i will not have a bed to sleep in when i shift.

no more pool downstairs where i can swim so i'm vexed.
can't even take a last swim cause my menses just came.

i feel lonely.

i'm tired..

ok i'm done whining.
it's not that bad right?

ok time to get back to work.

2008-10-12T23:03:00.002+08:00

shifting house depresses me..
i have no internet connection, no proper private space, 10 over banglas on my first floor and everything will be in a mess or in cartons. i hate it

and so rushed! tdy they announced that we have to move by sunday. wth. i havent packed A SINGLE THING.

and i'm about to have my exams soon.

andi have no idea where i'm gna hold my tuitions since the house will be filled with sounds of drilling and hammering.

stupid contractors, stupid tenants.

stupid irritating brother.

and he's not helping either. doesn't seem to be aware of how i feel.

i feel like punching someone.

2008-10-06T23:21:00.002+08:00

been busy with tuitions, like 6/7 hour stretches daily!! but their end of year are almost over alr:) havent started mugging at all!=/

yay adeline's wedding is coming! gret will be coming to stay tmr ! haha yay will be so much fun! cause all of us from babw are gg!!

hmmm apart from that, life has been pretty normal and dreary..

this is a really touching song.. reminds me of someone.. will i ever stop dreaming of you?

Did I disappoint you or let you down?
Should I be feeling guilty or let the judges frown?
Cause I saw the end before we'd begun,
Yes I saw you were blinded and I knew I had won.
So I took what's mine by eternal right.
Took your soul out into the night.
It may be over but it won't stop there,
I am here for you if you'd only care.
You touched my heart you touched my soul.
You changed my life and all my goals.
And love is blind and that I knew when,
My heart was blinded by you.
I've kissed your lips and held your head.
Shared your dreams and shared your bed.
I know you well, I know your smell.
I've been addicted to you.

Goodbye my lover.
Goodbye my friend.
You have been the one.
You have been the one for me.

I am a dreamer but when I wake,
You can't break my spirit - it's my dreams you take.
And as you move on, remember me,
Remember us and all we used to be
I've seen you cry, I've seen you smile.
I've watched you sleeping for a while.
I'd be the father of your child.
I'd spend a lifetime with you.
I know your fears and you know mine.
We've had our doubts but now we're fine,
And I love you, I swear that's true.
I cannot live without you.

Goodbye my lover.
Goodbye my friend.
You have been the one.
You have been the one for me.

And I still hold your hand in mine.
In mine when I'm asleep.
And I will bear my soul in time,
When I'm kneeling at your feet.

Goodbye my lover.
Goodbye my friend.
You have been the one.
You have been the one for me.

I'm so hollow, baby, I'm so hollow.
I'm so, I'm so, I'm so hollow.

2008-09-28T00:44:00.011+08:00

havent posted in awhile... been busy, with end of year's coming up, i'm up to my neck!

been catching a few movies though, step brothers, mamma mia, my best friend's girl...all not bad, lovelove mamma mia most!!

hmmm went out with gret today.. shopped alot, chatted alot, ate alot, cam whored alot!! went to town, ate at soup restaurant, shoppedshopped, looked for halloween outfits fruitlessly, hmm shopped at far east, and chilled at nydc:)

pondered abt some stuff also... sometimes i don't know if i'm doing the right thing, or if the right thing isn't so right after all... i don't want any more hurt, but i'm a selfish person who doesn't want to be alone either.. insecurity, indecisiveness, rashness.

okay pic s of today!

ugly faces!

haha we're not in a club or pub, we're at nydc heeren! haha!

in natural light

my lovely gretata!

retarded ffaces, i look evil here!

i like this pic:)

we could go on forever! lol!

but tired..

so went home! haha!

THE END. :)

2008-09-17T23:58:00.000+08:00

i guess some people never learn!! yes, that some being me!=/

haha here i am again, writing out a 1500 word essay in 2d1n! hmmm but i seem to be gettng better at spinning crap! it's geting easier to crap bullshit i don't even know anything about. haha if you were to seriously interrogate me and put me on a lie detector, i would turn up with a -50 IQ on that subject matter!

ah ok super rushing it out now, update again another day!

2008-09-16T20:36:00.004+08:00

i'm so in love with this song now.. the music is just so touching and beautiful... and a story close to the heart..

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LGGBoFeWVLw&feature=related
傻瓜 Fool
词:温岚 Lyrics: Landy Wen 曲:吴克群 Music: Wu Ke Qun
Translation: mellly - www.jay-chou.net

其实他做的坏事我们都懂
We all know what bad things he has done

没有什么不同
Not much difference

眼光闪烁暧昧流动
Roaming eyes and ambiguous relationships

闭上眼当作听说
I close my eyes and pretend they're just hearsay

其实别人的招数我们都懂
We know too well the tricks of others

没有什么不同
Not much difference

故作软弱撒娇害羞
Pretend to be weak and shy

只是有一点别扭
It's only a little unnatural

傻瓜也许单纯地懂
Fools are perhaps innocent

爱得没那么做作
Their love is not so pretentious

爱上了我不保留
When I have fallen in love, I won't hold back

傻瓜我们都一样
Fools we are, all the same

被爱情伤了又伤
Hurt by love time after time

相信这个他不一样
Believing that this one will be different

却又再一次受伤
And yet we get hurt once again

傻瓜我们都一样
Fools we are, all the same

受了伤却不投降
Hurt by love and yet never gave up

相信付出会有代价
Believing there will be a reward for our giving

代价只是一句傻瓜
And all it is, to be called a Fool

2008-09-14T21:39:00.024+08:00

HUGE RANDOM POST!!

MONTH OF END AUG-EARLY SEPT! :)

haha okay so i got lazy and when i finally uploaded photos, decided to do a massive post! wanted to post flea pics too but qiu hadn't sent me all yet! so prob another day!

ohoh and party was FANTASTIC! the girls were so adorable! haha danielle(the bday girl) was so so excited:) i miss them!!:) haha i like angmoh/internationals parties!

okay i don't really know if i uploaded it in chronological order, but aiya, almost same period of time!

this was the amt qiu and i ordered at ikea! gluttons right!=/

and we bought teacher's day gifts for each other! couldn't resist the sofy cuddly golden retreivers at ikea:) hailey and hayden!:)

on 31 august, my mom's side eldest cousin's daughter turned 1!!:) they stay at la casa so we went there for bbq~

check out this cool authentic vintage car! the number plate is E something , very few numbers! it doesn't even have door handles! oh and the engine's at the back of the car, MEGA HUGE!

bday girl NICOLE!

awww she's so adorable!

her bday cake! with a real barbie!

haha and er... i've been cooking!! after tuition one day huiqi and i cooked! we had a spanish potato omelette, a herbs potato dish and plum-apple-peach fruit brulee!!!

haha theegg got abit burnt, but great tasting still:)

dada came over for movie one day and we decided to experiment with various dips! nutella, chilli with mayo, and we melted our own cheese dip with lemon juice and black pepper!!:)

at the shop meeting we had a challenge, to dress bears in given theme, my group's theme was school's out! WE WON!! YAY!!

TOP LEFT: ah lian bear flinging sch jacket, untucked shirt, loose tie, mobile in pocket, gg to sing k (mic in hand!)
BOTTOM LEFT: scout girl preparing for her camping trip!

BOTTOM RIGHT: rocker chick sch girl who's in a wheelchair fue to a biking accident, but with her attitude intact:)

TOP RIGHT: her brother wheeling her out of sch, gg for practice with bball, chatting on phone with friend!:)

last wed after pm (we went for am session!) qiu and i chilled at plaza:) oh and i had a momentarary scare of losing my wallet! left it in sch=/ luckily liy was still in sch and saved it for me!

we got identical slippers and anklets!

went for party traning on thurs at headquarters! haha 4 outlets of staff tgt, it was chaotic! haha we were creting a ruckus from bugis mrt all the way to the hq~:)

my company is also part of/owns disney! ( i don't know which one lah) so got alotalot of disney products! i took pics of some!

mickey mouse phone!

wall e mag!

hannah montana stuffs!

belle photoframe

sleeping beauty photoframe

cinderella photoframe!

disney pillow!

a penguin i've never seen in store b4!super cuteeee!

haha i drew on the board~!

party traning was fun! we shared loads, learned loads, and even did the penguin dance tgt!! haha we recorded silly vids on employee satisfaction for the build-a-bear corp international! yay!

2008-09-13T23:06:00.001+08:00

FLEA was AMAZING! updates tmr! gna unpack and plan for party!:)

2008-09-12T21:53:00.002+08:00

yay another drudgy week is over!! oh and finall uploaded first collection post! spread the msg pls! http://kaerisse.livejournal.com !:)

hmmm school's still the same old boring but.. i went for party training ytd! yay not so fearful about parties now!

oh and i went to sing k today!:) super fun:)

ohohoh and the flea is tmr!:) can't wait! been busy packing the stocks and preparing all the stuffs for it:)

and....... i'll be holding a party this sun! as in shop party:) bunch of 6 year old ang-mohs! i'm so nervous and excited at the same time! hope they're nice kids!
ah i think i should plan for it!!:) hmmm what games would be suitable??

2008-09-06T15:12:00.001+08:00

hmmmm everything's been cancelled so i'm still at home.. took a nap but then got interrupted by people coming to see the flat=/

urgh life is boring.

think i shall go self-shopping. there's no one to ask out i think..

2008-09-06T12:17:00.008+08:00

3 sept 08, sec 4e1'04 girls outing!

decided to offer up a spastic pic of me=/

haha yes, we were cam -whoring a whole lot! for an hour! until i got backache=/ gosh!

okays see i finally uploaded pics! haha okays gg out now!

2008-09-06T12:03:00.002+08:00

before i begin my gibberish..

KAERISSE FIRST FLEA @ PALM GARDENS CONDO!
13 SEPT 08 3-530PM!

oh i'm so xcited, its in conjunction with the mid-autumn celebs held annually!:)

hmmm was thinking of switching to an lj account instead.. cause i can do the lj cut and not load a whole string of pics up! hmmm:)

well school has been school, been super busy and not busy at the same time, know what i mena right? on the other hand, i've been trying to lead a more holistic lifestyle! haha so i've been swimming, and cooking! haha after tuition my darling student huiqi and i whipped up a mean spanish potato omelette, herby potatoes and a fruit brulee! :) yumyum!!

well the super busy period has been relieved fortunately, now left with 1 mid sem test and essay to clear only!:)

ohoh and i caught WALL-E! eh pretty cute, slightly boring but the cute bots made up for it! story line abit far-fetched but then again it's 700 years into the future! haha all the fat fat people:)

oh yup mand on wed we had a rare 4e1 girls gathering! will upload pics in the next post! :) (see that's why i should use lj, makes the pics uploading and arranging much easier!)

today is a special day! gg kbox!

okay on the hindsight... been feeling mildly down here and there.. you know the days when you wake up and feel very lonely? hmm maybe life's like that in a way.. we seem to have mny friends, but as time goes by we're all gna be cusy with our committments and all, develop different ideologies and thoughts, and very soon, we drift apart without even realising it.. some days i jujst end up feeling rather ostrasized, out of place and lonely..

2008-08-21T22:05:00.002+08:00

esssayssss=/

last week completed ER essay in 3d2n, staying up till 3 plus almost 3 nights..

this week, was busy with HMT project essay =/ did in in like 2d1n=/ record-breaking~
tues we were at national library the entire day from mornnig to closing! qiu and jiali came to stayover at my place after to continue, and we had night and morning eauty regimes! lol:) we did till abt 5 plus am, then julian came over in the morn to continue,and we went to pm lecture to sleep=/

was so exhausted, tdy overslept so much, reached school abt 11 plus=/ went home to sleep another 3 hours after..

sigh BF test on tues coming up, then HMT individual essay will be due the week after =/ sigh it;s just so exhausting altogether...

2008-08-12T21:42:00.002+08:00

i hate writing essays!! urgh!=/

been so freaking busy with essay, test and project and tuitions and work!

random thought: feel llike switching over to lj! haha!

for those who don't know yet:

http://kaerisse.livejournal.com - our new shop! not fully ready yet, so keep checking back!!

luckily i spend my weekends with joy:)

mini recount!

haha last last fri the 1st, went to vivo after sch! long time since liy qiu and i went for shopping trip!! we all bought containers from daiso=/ haha! then went to JP to watch money not enough!! ah so so only to me. touching though, i cried alot!!

sat the 2nd, went to watch the Mummy 3 in the morn!! ah also so so only. abit boring. haha and then, i went east coast cycling!! been so long since i've done that!!

Sunday the 3rd, after working morning shift, went to chinese gardens:) very tranquil~ :)

mon the 4th, qiu and i rushed preview and selling blog up till 2am!! haha great sense of accomplishment!!

tues the 5th, went to woodlands lib with darling qiu to reserch for essay finally:) haha! and shopped at causeway! went to the SCIENCE CENTRE also!! haha and then to IKEA for meatballs!!

fri the 8th, went to vivo again! haha qiu drove us there!! caught JOURNEY TO THE CENTRE OF THE EARTH. nice!! if only s'pore theatres got 3D! shopshopshop and ate at MARCHE after!! and played this ball game at arcade where you throw balls at targets on the big screen:)

sat the 9th, NATIONAL DAY~!! haha we went to flea!! bought new dresses and accessories!! then went to NDP gathering of mum's side at aunt's place, everyone was in red and white, haha!

sunday the 10th, DARLING'S BIRTHDAY! went to loads of places, to ESCAPE! but rained=/ so went to bugis instead for hot milk pearl tea and then to suntec to watch the WORLD CYBER GAMES! haha i actually know abit about DOTA now! walked around suntec and marina also!! at night, went to MINISTRY OF FOOD CAFE at lot 1 for macha and mango sundaes!!:) haha got darling a BIGBIGBIG alarm clock so now she can morning call me instead!! haha!

okay that's all for intersting events! gosh i typed THRICE as much as what i typed for my essay so far!!=/test tmr also:(

sigh back to essay!

2008-07-27T00:44:00.002+08:00

sigh i feel so drained and tired from the week!

and thinking of the essays and research i have to do...

i'm looking at my schedule now and apart from sch and tuitions and the 2 shifts, i don't have any time to gather any researh or visit any libraries... sigh.. i feel like just halting all tuition for 3 days so i can focus on my essays... and group research, but i can't!:( sigh..

i'm so tired.. someone save me..

2008-07-25T18:09:00.002+08:00

a really beautiful song..

Lucky - jason mraz and colbie cailat

Do you hear me, I'm talking to you
Across the water across the deep blue ocean
Under the open sky, oh my, baby I'm trying

Boy I hear you in my dreams
I feel your whisper across the sea
I keep you with me in my heart
You make it easier when life gets hard

I'm lucky I'm in love with my best friend
Lucky to have been where I have been
Lucky to be coming home again
Ooohh ooooh oooh oooh ooh ooh ooh ooh

They don't know how long it takes
Waiting for a love like this
Every time we say goodbye
I wish we had one more kiss
I'll wait for you I promise you, I will

I'm lucky I'm in love with my best friend
Lucky to have been where I have been
Lucky to be coming home again
Lucky we're in love every way
Lucky to have stayed where we have stayed
Lucky to be coming home someday

And so I'm sailing through the sea
To an island where we'll meet
You'll hear the music fill the air
I'll put a flower in your hair

though the breezes through trees
Move so pretty you're all I see
As the world keeps spinning round
You hold me right here right now

I'm lucky I'm in love with my best friend
Lucky to have been where I have been
Lucky to be coming home again
I'm lucky we're in love every way
Lucky to have stayed where we have stayed
Lucky to be coming home someday
Ooohh ooooh oooh oooh ooh ooh ooh ooh Ooooh ooooh oooh oooh ooh ooh ooh ooh

2008-07-24T22:54:00.000+08:00

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ggdoi0rgSjI&feature=related

he is just so super talented!!!:)

ENJOY!

2008-07-23T00:43:00.001+08:00

here's the song i composed... but stil incomplete! feedback and let me know yup:)

Sandman's dust

1st stanza
Have you, my dear, ever seen a teardrop sparkle?
Have you, a dream, no one every could decipher?
Cause i've heard those words
And they stay within my memory
All the times we had
All the joys we shared
Let them be, oh let them be

bridge
Cause i can't seem to understand
The way things work out in the end
It made no sense
When you turned your back and left

chorus
Oh baby we once a dream
I'm forced to wake up from
Saying "no regrets,
I love you too"
The kiss that sparked anew

The velvet nights and silvery dawns
They turn to dust reformed
To the sandman's sack
No looking back
The love once there now gone

2nd stanza
Do you remember, when we first met in the summer?
Do you recall, when you said " I love you more"?
Cause now i've learned
That love in all its mystery
Brings along such pain
Nothing's left the same
When you're gone
I'm left with me..

repeat bridge and chorus

eh last stanza/bridge not yet completed!

2008-07-22T22:13:00.002+08:00

i'm in love with this song!!:)

http://www.imeem.com/isaacgandalf/music/9jvpKg9v/jason_mraz_im_yours/
(couldn't embed it here, so click on link to hear it!=/)

Jason Mraz - I"M YOURS

Well you dawned me and you bet I felt it
I tried to be chill but you're so hot that I melted
I fell right through the cracks
Now I'm trying to get back
Before the cool done run out
I'll be giving it my bestest
Nothing's going to stop me but divine intervention
I reckon it's again my turn to win some or learn some

But I won't hesitate no more, no more
It cannot wait, I'm yours

Well open up your mind and see like me
Open up your plans and damn you're free
Look into your heart and you'll find love, love, love, love
Listen to the music of the moment, people dance and sing
We're just one big family
It's our God-forsaken right to be loved love loved love love

So I won't hesitate no more, no more
It cannot wait I'm sure
There's no need to complicate
Our time is short
This is our fate, I'm yours

(Skat)Won't you come on
Scooch on over closer dear
And I will nibble your ear
(Skat)

I've been spending way too long checking my tongue in the mirror
And bending over backwards just to try to see you clearer
But my breath fogged up the glass
And so I drew a face and I laughed
I guess what I be saying is there ain't no better reason
To rid yourself of vanities and just go with the seasons
It's what we aim to do
Our name is our virtue

But I won't hesitate no more, no more
It cannot wait I'm yours
There's no need to complicate
Our time is short
This is our fate, I'm yours

Well no no, well open up your mind and see like me
Open up your plans and damn you're free
Look into your heart and you'll find love love love love
Listen to the music of the moment come and dance with me
I like one big family (2nd time: I like happy family)
It's our God-forsaken right to be loved love love love

I won't hesitate no more
Oh no more no more no more
It's your God-forsaken right to be loved, I'm sure
There's no need to complicate
Our time is short
This is our fate, I'm yours
No I won't hesitate no more, no more
This cannot wait I'm sure
There's no need to complicate
Our time is short
This is our fate, I'm yours, I'm yours

2008-07-21T10:35:00.002+08:00

yay!! i'm so proud of myself! i actually got my tagboard up again!!:) MYSELF! gosh:)
feel free to tag again!!:)

hmmm... i went to ndp preview on sat after work! ah i'll load pics on my next post!

and i wrote another song ytd:)

haha short post, update more next time!:)

2008-07-17T23:13:00.002+08:00

LIBRARY BOOK SALE!!:)

(free publicity)

ah!! i would love to go but i'm utterly broke=/

haha okays i've been preparing dinners for 3 consecutive night! suprising eh!

MENU for tues: SPICY TUNA LINGUINE!! plus mum's-style salad!

wed: toasted baguette with garlic spread and clam chowder soup, with japanese handrolls!

thurs: seafood macaroni soup with prawn crabstick cuttlefishball cabbage and mixed vegs, and fried shrimp gyozas!

haha yay think future chef!:)

ah just spurs of the moments. after 1 week i'll be out of ideas on what to cook alr=/ haha!

okays this is a really random post=/ goodnight!:)

2008-07-16T00:11:00.000+08:00

oh no my tag board's not working=/ HELP!!

sl dinner + flyer

2008-07-15T23:47:00.001+08:00

SEC 4 SINGAPORE FLYER + FAREWELL DINNER!

11 JULY 2008

haha the school treated us (the JA) to ride on the Singapore flyer along with the sec 4s! haha yay! oh yup, and we had our own table also at the guilin restaurant after!!:) so here are overdued pics of that day!

@ THE FLYER!!:)

uber cute cabins!

they don't stop for you to enter!! haha luckily not very fast moving so just walk on:)

with junhao and mr rani!

the group i tagged with, clubs and arts leaders!

haha yes i know i'm very short!!

while above, i spotted a great chilling place!!haha!!

floating stadium!! quite small hor~

godzilla's sister:) *hugs building*

capsule ahead of us at its peak!!!

we're almost at the peak!

another group pic!

the splendid view (notice there's only 1 pic) singapore not much to view=/

landscape below! netting to prevent idiots from falling al the way down:)

pretty!

big spokes!!

mr toh! (yes i know i'm very short, he has to lean down)=S

dunearn sec 4 SLs!!

DINNER @ GUILIN RESTAURANT @CDANS!

with sec 3 sls!

ASHRI!!!:) (one of my favs!) MC for the night!

under me for sec 3 camp and activity day 1!:)

sec 4s coming in!

liy and i!

mr wong! principal from my time till now

JA table! ressal (VP JA), liy and junhao(P JA)!

halimah, liyana04, liyana07!

alif, me ressal junhao

gorgeous halimah!

kahmeng!! haha my many time same group camper/sl!

haha sec 3 camp 07, sec 3 sl camp 07, sec 3 camp 08 (originally then switched to buddy group), sl ic for activity day 1:)

coleen! sl with me for sec 1 orientation!

halimah, new president of SC sohila, liy & liyana, natasha (pres cca council 07-08), me and cons!

brother and sister!

sohail (president sc 07-08) halimah, sohila (pres sc 08-09), me!

handsome benedict!! aka 'the higher the better':)

rmb him and ashri as super enthuists at sec 3 camp!

winandar aka dada! haha cute short form i developed for him during sec 3 camp!

sl with me for sec 1 orientation camp also!

danielle! sl with me for sec 3 camp!

i love her hat!!:)

under me for sec 3 camp 07:) i rmb she loves wearing caps:) wore one thoughout the camp:)

guzheng girls!!:)

haha i only know yejia (bottom), cons(above her) and isabelle(beside me)

ye jia was sl under me for sec 3 sl camp 07, quite quiet but sweet:)

haha isabelle is as loud as always! super cheerful:) and vegetarian! super healthy!:)

ANDREW! i call him ARSENAL ! haha i've seen him in TWO arsenal jerseys alr!! GO ARSENAL!:) my fav team!

bingo! game of that night. haha i took it upside down facing me so after rotating pic looks weird=/

JAs WON THE 2ND ROUND!!!:)

checking out numbers~

prize-giving!

ABEL, "the able one" as quoted by mdm khong:)

firm and sturdy character, didn't break during our inteviews!:)

i think we bear some resemblance!

eric low, invited back to grace the occasion to see the dearies he brought up before leaving the school:)

mr RANI! one of my fav teacher!! he's the reason i'm an SL! he picked me out one day and asked me to go for SL camp to be house leader for jaguar. haha!

band performance!

MCs!

zaki!!:) under me for hmmm sec 3 camp 07 if i didn't rmb wrongly:)

very very friendly and super helpful person!!:)

mdm sarinah!!
contrary to what students think, she's supppppperrrrr NICE!

my beloved constance!!:)
sl with me for sec 3 camp 07! haha love her!

may peng! gorgeous! under me for sec 3 camp 07 and sl camp 07! haha and in my sec 1 orientation camp preparation team!:) super initiative person:)

haha kahmeng looks funny here!

enqi and i!!:) we have the same birthdays!!:) haha my playful kid from 2n2'07

under me for activity day 1 '08:)

retarded faces!

sabrina, vp sc 07-08!

Ira! under me for activity day 1 08 'tofu girl'!:)

my last yr 2n2/n3 cutesies!

dada again!

tony! last yr 4n2! writes beautiful poems:)
has great aspirations also! always asking me abt jc stuff!:)

keep going tony!:)

after the dinner went to catch hellboy!:) haha we were all so bushed !

haha yup that's it for pics! haha i uploaded and typed for don't know how long! zzz gg to slp now!

2008-07-03T21:58:00.008+08:00

school has reopened~!!=/

haha past 2 lectures have been extremely dry and boring!=/ aiyo, the sounds don't go in one ear and out the other, it just streamlines over the ears=/

ah.. on a happier note, my darling is back from hk! and with alot of goodies! hopefully we can launch out soon! been doing alot of hw, me the tech-idiot learning how to use lj and photoshop! haha and i have a dale from k disneyland! called daerisse, named after qiu lo:)

ah some random pics from bro's bday bbq on sunday and meeting with jc friends on monday!

brother's bday cake!

17 alr!

monday with acjc girls!

at secret recipe!

chun me grace!

while heading off, spotted a store selling these weird looking dolls=/

offspring of elmo and cookie monster=/

merge elmo and oscar!

mutated sesame street characters

WEIRD!!!

haha i like cookie monster and oscar most, UNMUTATED!:)

okaysss randomness! =/

2008-06-25T23:08:00.002+08:00

Sweet Memories

Natsukashii itami da wa
Zutto mae ni wasurete ita
Demo anata wo mita toki
Jikan dake atomodori shita no
"Shiawase?" to kikanaide
Uso tsuku no wa jouzu ja naiTomodachi nara iru kedo
Anna ni wa moeagarenakute
Ushinatta yume dake ga
Utsukushiku mieru no wa naze kashira
Sugisatta yasashisa mo ima wa
Amai kioku sweet memories

Don't kiss me baby
we can never be
So don't add more pain
Please don't hurt me again
I have spent so many nights
Thinking of you
longing for your touch
I have once loved you so much

Ano koro wa wakasugite
Itazura ni kizutsukeatta futari
Iroaseta kanashimi mo ima wa
Tooi kioku sweet memories
Ushinatta yume dake ga
Utsukushiku mieru no wa naze kashira
Sugisatta yasashisa mo ima wa
Amai kioku sweet memories

2008-06-24T10:12:00.002+08:00

The DIFFERENCE between Science and God

'Let me explain the problem science has with Jesus Christ.' The atheist professor of philosophy pauses before his class and then asks one of his new students to stand.

'You're a Christian, aren't you, son?

''Yes sir,' the student says.

'So you believe in God?

''Absolutely.

''Is God good?

''Sure! God's good.

''Is God all-powerful? Can God do anything?

''Yes.

''Are you good or evil?

''The Bible says I'm evil.

'The professor grins knowingly. 'Aha! The Bible!'
He considers for a moment.

'Here's one for you. Let's say there's a sick person over here and you can cure him. You can do it. Would you help him? Would you try?'

'Yes sir, I would.

''So you're good...!

''I wouldn't say that.

''But why not say that? You'd help a sick and maimed person ifyou could. Most of us would if we could. But God doesn't.

'The student does not answer, so the professor continues.
'He doesn't, does he? My brother was a Christian who died of cancer, even though he prayed to Jesus to heal him How is this Jesus good? Hmmm? Canyou answer that one?'The student remains silent.'No, you can't, can you?' the professor says.

He takes a sip ofwater from a glass on his desk to give the student time to relax.'Let's start again, young fella Is God good?

''Er...yes,' the student says.

'Is Satan good?'

The student doesn't hesitate on this one. 'No.

''Then where does Satan come from?

'The student : 'From...God...

''That's right. God made Satan, didn't he? Tell me, son. Is there evil in this world?

''Yes, sir.

''Evil's everywhere, isn't it? And God did make everything,correct?

''Yes.

''So who created evil?'

The professor continued, 'If God createdeverything, then God created evil, since evil exists, and according tothe principle that our works define who we are, then God is evil.'Without allowing the student to answer, the professor continues:'Is there sickness? Immorality? Hatred? Ugliness? All these terriblethings, do they exist in this world?

'The student: 'Yes.

''So who created them?'

The student does not answer again, so the professor repeats hisquestion. 'Who created them? There is still no answer.

Suddenly thelecturer breaks away to pace in front of the classroom. The class is mesmerized.

'Tell me,' he continues onto another student.
'Do you believe in Jesus Christ, son?'

The student's voice is confident: 'Yes, professor, I do.'

The old man stops pacing. 'Science says you have five senses you use to identify and observe the world around you. Have you ever seen Jesus?

''No sir. I've never seen Him''

Then tell us if you've ever heard your Jesus?

''No, sir, I have not..

''Have you ever actually felt your Jesus, tasted your Jesus orsmelt your Jesus? Have you ever had any sensory perception of JesusChrist, or God for that matter?

''No, sir, I'm afraid I haven't.

''Yet you still believe in him?

''Yes.''

According to the rules of empirical, testable, demonstrableprotocol, science says your God doesn't exist. What do you say to that,son?

''Nothing,' the student replies. 'I only have my faith.'

'Yes, faith,' the professor repeats. 'And that is the problem science has with God. There is no evidence, only faith.'

The student stands quietly for a moment, before asking aquestion of his own. 'Professor, is there such thing as heat?

''Yes,' the professor replies. 'There's heat.

''And is there such a thing as cold?

''Yes, son, there's cold too.

''No sir, there isn't.'The professor turns to face the student, obviously interested.The room suddenly becomes very quiet.

The student begins to explain.'You can have lots of heat, even more heat, super-heat,mega-heat, unlimited heat, white heat, a little heat or no heat, but wedon't have anything called 'cold'.

We can hit up to 458 degrees belowzero, which is no heat, but we can't go any further after that. There isno such thing as cold; otherwise we would be able to go colder than thelowest -458 degrees. Every body or object is susceptible to study whenit has or transmits energy, and heat is what makes a body or matter haveor transmit energy. Absolute zero (-458 F) is the total absence of heat.You see, sir, cold is only a word we use to describe the absence ofheat. We cannot measure cold. Heat we can measure in thermal unitsbecause heat is energy.

Cold is not the opposite of heat, sir, just theabsence of it.'

Silence across the room. A pen drops somewhere in the classroom,sounding like a hammer.

'What about darkness, professor. Is there such a thing as darkness?

''Yes,' the professor replies without hesitation. 'What is night if it isn't darkness?'

'You're wrong again, sir. Darkness is not something; it is theabsence of something. You can have low light, normal light, brightlight, flashing light, but if you have no light constantly you haveNothing and it's called darkness, isn't it? That's the meaning we use to define the word. In reality, darkness isn't. If it were, you would be able to make darkness darker, wouldn't you?'

The professor begins to smile at the student in front of him.This will be a good semester. 'So what point are you making, young man?

''Yes, professor. My point is, your philosophical premise is flawed to start with, and so your conclusion must also be flawed.'

The professor's face cannot hide his surprise this time.'Flawed? Can you explain how?

''You are working on the premise of duality,' the student explains. 'You argue that there is life and then there's death; a goodGod and a bad God. You are viewing the concept of God as somethingfinite, something we can measure. Sir, science can't even explain a thought. It uses electricity and magnetism, but has never seen, muchless fully understood either one. To view death as the opposite of lifeis to be ignorant of the fact that death cannot exist as a substantivething.

Death is not the opposite of life, just the absence of it.

''Now tell me, professor. Do you teach your students that they evolved from a monkey?

''If you are referring to the natural evolutionary process, youngman, yes, of course I do

''Have you ever observed evolution with your own eyes, sir?' The professor begins to shake his head, still smiling, as herealizes where the argument is going. A very good semester, indeed.

'Since no one has ever observed the process of evolution at work and cannot even prove that this process is an on-going endeavor, are you not teaching your opinion, sir? Are you now not a scientist, but a preacher?'

The class is in uproar. The student remains silent until the Commotion has subsided.

'To continue the point you were making earlier to the otherstudent, let me give you an example of what I mean.'The student looks around the room. 'Is there anyone in the classwho has ever seen the professor's brain?'

The class breaks out intolaughter.

'Is there anyone here who has ever heard the professor's brain,felt the professor's brain, touched or smelled the professor's brain? No one appears to have done so. So, according to the established rules ofempirical, stable, demonstrable protocol, science says that you have no brain, with all due respect, sir. So if science says you have no brain,how can we trust your lectures, sir?'

Now the room is silent. The professor just stares at thestudent, his face unreadable. Finally, after what seems an eternity, the old man answers. 'I guess you'll have to take them on faith.

''Now, you accept that there is faith, and, in fact, faith exists with life,' the student continues.

'Now, sir, is there such a thing as evil?'

Now uncertain, the professor responds, 'Of course, there is. We see it everyday. It is in the daily example of man's inhumanity to man. It is in the multitude of crime and violence everywhere in the world.These manifestations are nothing else but evil.'

To this the student replied, 'Evil does not exist sir, or at least it does not exist unto itself. Evil is simply the absence of God. It is just like darkness and cold, a word that man has created to describe the absence of God. God did not create evil. Evil is the result of what happens whenman does not have God's love present in his heart. It's like the cold that comes when there is no heat or the darkness that comes when there is no light.'The professor sat down….

2008-06-23T14:08:00.025+08:00

POST OF RANDOMNESS!!

this was on the way to bintan:) my love:)

activity day: tou fu! haha!

Ash and egg with slight crack!:)

group 5 student leaders!!!

haha haikal's leg was used as "paper"

At the bear gathering! to celebrate sunte branch's 1 year birthday!

haz and fufu!

haha we brought 1 bear each!

lumpy in cinema:)

tegan and my NEW POLO JACKET!! :)

beer from indo:)

yet another shopping trip:)

mmmmm we eat alot right!!! haha for lunch only eh!

ANOTHER shopping trip:)

new clothes for 1 yr old Fighter!!:)

at lot 1! haha poor mascots=/

MOF macha sundae i like!!

huiqi bought me donuts!!:)

her coolest remote car

dimples getting the ride of his life!

new gem bear!! sweet purple!! i actually like it! haha~

mom prepared salad for my dinner for work:)

haha i pumped these balloons! took a secret shot while on shift=/ self timer! haha!

and upcoming.... qiu and i are creating a new baby!! see we're getting our tools ready!!

SECRET!

2008-06-21T12:45:00.000+08:00

PICTURES FROM BINTAN!!

4-6TH JUNE 2008

haha okay i finally got around to uploading them (so many)! took me a few days to upload(seriously).. haha i don't know why blogger doesn't allow me the 5 multiple pics uploads, but the individual ones only=/ so it took really really long=/

haha it's the first time i left singapore with friends only!!

yup although we went only 3d2n, alot happened there!! okay if i stillllll recall clearly:)

DAY 1

the dress i wore there:)

(haha note sleepy expression - packed last min late into the night!)

on the mrt on the way there!

haha first stop: the gluttons need their food!
POPEYE at changi airport!! :)
(that's not blood, it's jam on a scone:)

our luggage!:)

at the ferry terminal: the ferry we were boarding! :)

haha qiu fell asleep pretty soon!

retarded faces!

departing Singapore!!

approaching bintan, a small lighthouse island:)

yup we checked into the hotel, nirwana gardens hotel! they made us wait pretty long, so le made them give us a room upgrade:)

our room!! :) very cosy:)

after doing a small unpacking we went to explore!

darling le and me outside our room!
(that's the sea at the back!)

haha the beach was beautiful, but no hunks!! haha we were very dissappointed!

the big chess pieces!!

on the buggies:)

bus to pasar oleh oleh!! :)

very very small kitten that kept follwing me around!

hmmm the pasar was quite disappointing cause it was pretty small and quiet.. so we grabbed some food and went off~

haha!

haha le purposely cut qiu off in this shot!

went opposite pasar oleh oleh to kampong lagoi:) very pretty structures~

haha the camera was put on timer and balanced on the top of a green tea bottle!!

we went to check out the spa facilities!! :)

the ambience was great, so relaxing! plus all the aromatherapy smells~

bathtub in the room!

haha cause we were too engrossed we missed our bus back to the hotel!! and we didn't want to stick around for another 2 hours=/ so a guy there said if we booked a spa for the next day, he'd drive us back for $5! lol, i think we were quite brave actually, haha pay people money and board someone's car to the hotel.. the hotel was quite faraway and the road was all dark with no street lamps..luckily they needed us to go back the next day to get the commission so they got us safely back:) haha but the people there are generally quite friendly and courteous~

after we got back, changed into night clothes~ lol. we bought shawls at the pasar, so qiu and le wore them as tops:)

at the hotel pub:)

small but cosy!

hmmm there was a mini karaoke thing, where different tables get to pick the songs they wanted and took turns to sing it:) all the oldies songs~

flaming lambourghini!! :) haha very la (as in hot)!!

oh yup, the table in front of us consisted of a married lesbian couple!

they were damn sweet and fun!!:)

pub!

haha drank and sang till we were damn high, then qiu and i got very tipsy and we all went back. with some help:) haha:)

DAY 2

no parents to nag! haah our room's in a mess!

after breakfast(cupnoodles) we went to the beach! walked over to the beach club:)

albino hibiscus!

the sea!

on our towels~

pic taken through le's shades~

haha act cool!

loves~

chilled awhile at the beach club

hmmm i was having a slight hangover~ so was sleepy at the beginning=/

until i saw qiu gg out to sea with a bunch of guys on the banana boat! haha~

so i went on the speedboat that was gg to drag their banana boat around:)

me with boy (that's his name!)

can spot qiu? haha amonsgt so many JAP guys!

haha lucky her ah! haha being on the speedboat far away from the land was the greatest sensation... felt so so free, feeling the wind blowing at you, the freedom and excitement:)

haha after that, the next driver deni, brought qiu out on the speedboat and taught her how to drive it! haha and boy brought me out on a jetski and let me drive it also!! :) haha and we did all that for free:) maybe cause we were the only girls around:)

le and i!
jap guy (24) haha we call him 24 cause of his age! his name is song ben gui gong~

a few of the company of jap guys:) the one in brown 2nd top is 25 (age again), very nice. and 24 at extreme right!:)

gorgeous

next up, we went back to shower and head for our spa! we were taxied over by the spa company:) was super relaxing:) qiu and i had a papaya enzyme body scrub, followed by a massage:)

in the meantime, le befriended 2 singaporean tourguides that gave us discounts at the restaurants:)

the restaurant is called helo helo!

haha we have our own cook:) haha lazy girls~

yummy! the food was great:)

haha posing in the middle of pasar oleh oleh!

love the lights, haha we all agreed it looked better on our 2nd visit!

we had our names burned on a wooden bamboo clip!

walkway to our room!

went back to the pub~

haha the bartender knows us well by then~ gave us free drink! his own concoction, he names it chocolate cake! very very nice! ends with a chocolate aftertaste:)

was very quiet the 2nd night, the lesbian couple went back alr.. so the whole pub, only had us and the 2 singaporead tourguides.. so just chatted here and there, sang some songs, and went back to shower and slp:)

DAY 3

haha look at our rubbish~

on the beds still! haha i showered alr!

haha~

threesome!!

all too soon, was time to head back alr~ but not before we shopped at polo ralph lauren!! lol:) qiu and i bought a jacket each!! :)

we dropped off our key(cause le said they'd bill us to the credit card) and took te bus to the ferry terminal~ haha who knows, it's not that way.. 1 hour before departure the hotel staff chased us down to the ferry terminal to bill us=/and couldn't pay by card cause he came just with the bill.. to head back to pay, we would miss the ferry.. and we were out of cash! so no choice, me and qiu had to take a cab to the nearest atm to draw money=/ haha again we were quite brave, gg to a very ulu place with someone we didn't know to draw out a huge sum of money. first time i draw out almost 3 million plus!! haha rupiah lah but still alot of money=/ was quite scared=/ but luckily, we were safe:)

haha at the ferry terminal when our passports were being stamped, the one stamping my passport asked for email.. haha initially i was puzzled, then realized that they wanted our email adds! lol.. the funniest thing was, their uniforms were so tightfit there were horizontal creases across their shirts=/

view from the ferry

sad faces:(

departing bintan ferry terminal~

no more! haha that's the end of our holiday:) loved it:) really hope we'd get to do something like that soon again!! :)

2008-06-14T23:59:00.002+08:00

one of my fav tracks now:)

Someone to hold me tight
That would be very nice
Someone to love me right
That would be very nice

Someone to understand
Each little dream in me
Someone to take my hand
To be a team with me

So nice, life would be so nice
If one day I'd find
Someone who would take my hand
And samba through life with me

Someone to cling to me
Stay with me right or wrong
Someone to sing to me
Some little samba song

Someone to take my heart
And give his heart to me
Someone who's ready to
Give love a start with me

Oh yes, that would be so nice
Should it be you and me
I could see it could be nice

and a jap song with this eng verse:

don't kiss me baby, we can never be
so don't add more pain, please don't hurt me again
i have spent so many nights thinking of you
longing for your touch, i have once loved you so much

2008-06-09T23:53:00.002+08:00

haha i've been lazylazylazy=/

haha bintan was super fun and relaxing, esp only qith qiu and le around:) havent got all the pics from qiu yet, so after i do i'll make a detailed post, *promise! lol:)

haha can't really shop now, parents confiscate one of my accounts=/ (the one with the more money of course=/) so now i'm broke=/shucks=/

\still in the mood to shop though! tmr is the one month deadline qiu and i gave ourselves to moce on! and tmr we get our reward: fossil bags!

haha and oh yah, we both bought polo ralph lauren jackets also! haha will post pics:)

oh well, still in shopping mood, another spree tmr:)

2008-06-08T00:29:00.001+08:00

sang this in bintan, a beautiful song..

There's a hero
If you look inside your heart
You don't have to be afraid
Of what you are

There's an answer
If you reach into your soul
And the sorrow that you know
Will melt away

[Chorus:]
And then a hero comes along
With the strength to carry on
And you cast your fears aside
And you know you can survive

So when you feel like hope is gone
Look inside you and be strong
And you'll finally see the truth
That a hero lies in you

It's a long road
When you face the world alone
No one reaches out a hand
For you to hold

You can find love
If you search within yourself
And the emptiness you felt
Will disappear

[Chorus]

Lord knows
Dreams are hard to follow
But don't let anyone
Tear them away
Just hold on
There will be tomorrow
And in time
You'll find the way

[Chorus]

2008-06-03T00:10:00.005+08:00

AJISEN! haha my first time there tdy:) they have amazing desserts:) very very pretty!

my dessert~ some mango sundae thing

qiu's desest, macha sundae i think:)

haha qiu couldn't believe i've never eaten at ajisen~ so brought me to eatat imm:) then we went shopping for bintan food:) and sunblock! haha:) soexcited! can't wait !! 2 more days!! :)

spot the odd one out? haha qiu did that when i changed my mind to get cereal instead of chips:)

ohoh and this is dardar!!

in the guy jap outfit - a yukata i think:)

big, fat, soft, cuddly, cute, what's not to like? :)

2008-05-31T23:42:00.002+08:00

zzz damn tiring day.

feeling quite pissed off also..

firstly, cause while i was booking ferry ticks, waited so long for all the info to come in, and broher restarted p all info gone. and i had to rush for work, and apparently no one else could book also. ended up the ferry was fully booked, we had no choice but to book a 2and a half hour later ferry.=/

work was busy busy busy. only me jas and angie from 7-10. killer. crowd was so mad we closed almost 6k. and well it was mainly me and angie handling that 3 hour crowd. the other one is just for show. don't know why she's still around. if ade were around, she sure got sacked long long ago. urgh. i hate the new shop environment. it's so dead. i'm the ONLY one still saying 'hi welcome to build a bear workshop!' the rest don't even bother to greet=/ terrible attitudes.

and. not only refuse to serve, refuse to help with stock when it comes, refuse to help replenish stock. i don't understand why there must be 3 persons behind the cahier and 2 out on selling floor on such a peak period. so not only understaffed, peak hour, uncooperative staff, no enthusiasm, overall very draining day at work. i'm so on the verge of quitting.

well on the other hand.. i seem to be attracting weird guys=/ tdy at the store, got this group of guys who bought bears. they lingered very very long, overheard them wanting to ask me for my name and all=/ siam-ed them by gg for break=/ haha:) not used to guys app me now i guess=/ i'll tend to treat them indifferently=/

and...after work dad came to pick me from tower 2 roundabout.. while waiting another group of guys sat very close to me.. i ping ming call people to talk to them so they won't have anychance to talk to me. overheard them wanting to ask for my number=/ when dad came and i got up they were like 'eh she go alr eh! how?' haha =/

haha can't wait for bintan:) holiiiiiidayyyyyyyyyy!!!!!!!! :) i still want to shop!! =/ but i've been spending way to much alr=/ in may alone i spent abt 1.4 k on i don't know what? =/ oh man. i need to earn more money=/

2008-05-30T00:12:00.009+08:00

i feel old. period. =/

haha see the new guys who befriend me are all younger than me. 18 or 19.=/ i'm 20! lol..

on mon qiu and i re-combed bugis:) haha spent ALOT! haha but i've been buying a variety of diff things i've been wanting to get:)

on tues gave tuition , and slacked a whole day.. so lonely! cause qiu liy and dada all not free:( oh and i got a new number to sms with! haha so i have two phones now:) yup met qiu to chill at beans after:)

haha ytd after tuition met qiu and we window shopped around cine and heeren:) we didn't buy anything! good girls! haha ate at hip diner and chilled at nydc after window shopping:)

oh yup, decided to shorten the bintan trip to 3d2n hence saving some money! haha hence felt more shoppish tdy=/

worked in the morn, there was stock tdy, 88 cartons.. was busy changing fixtures and displays, time pass very fast:) haha working is boring now without my siao buddies kris nat gret shikin and fufu=( kris quit, nat and gret transferred to ps, never get same shifts as shikin and fufu :( sigh.. don't really look forward to work anymore..

after work went to meet qiu at town, picked up stuff from irene and then went to tcc to chill:) haha chilled very long until one of the waitors got friendly with us=/ but he gave us BOTH free tcc membership! haha~ but he's also 18. lol..

yup more shoppish mood so we went to shop abit:) bought my first green top! haha i don't usually buy green, but this was more of white toning to apple green tie-dye top~ and eh pink boxers-looking shorts:) haha wanted to buy this checkered spag but more ex..:( must shop in moderation cause my spending power gg down alr.. spent alotalot alr! plus all the cabbing also=/ cause we're lazy people=/ haha~

hmmm tmr giving tuition again~ maybe catching a movie with liy:)

tea shake hut at bugis:) haha our fav hot pearl milk tea:)

at hip diner

haha mango freeze! damn huge!

at nydc :)

see i make myself at home:) so fat!!

her laziness:)

at mrt station on the way back=/ haha love you dear!! :)

have you ever loved and lost somebody

wished there was a chance to say i'm sorry

have you ever felt your heart was breaking

looking down the road you should be taking

i should know;

cause i loved and lost the day i let you go..

2008-05-28T00:32:00.002+08:00

haha i've been so incredibly lazy of late=/ hardly upload! haha loads of pics but er.. i'm always home so late and tired i don't feel like uploading=/

haha been shopping alot!! qiu and her shopping mood:) so... been spending alot=/ we combed city hall, bugis, far east, even lot 1 (managed to spend over 100 there!) and yah lor here and there more,abit of town.. hmmm... buying a variety of things i guess.. just feel like having a fresh new change:)

well things are officially over btw us now... i'll still miss him at times, but i know, it's for the best this way..

oh yupm, i have a new number also!! haha see even shop for new hp number:) it's an extra number cause i always exceed limit=/ so my old number is still in use, i just have 2 phones now=/ haha:)

oh and yup, bintan is confirmed!! wll be gg next week with qiu and le:) haha can't wait!

hmmm may be gg back to dunearn tmr to help with d&d..went back last weel to help with napfa! haha i feel young again when i'm in dunearn with all the sec sch kids:) haha very soon, the leadership camp is coming up again, in fact activity day is on the 7th!

oh well.. i'm still lazy to upload pics. shall upload er.. tmr!! :) haha HAPPY HOLIDAYS!! :)

2008-05-25T00:28:00.002+08:00

just thought it suits me now.. the singer is the 7 yr old connie talbot from britain's got talent:) i love her voice:)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3QUh6CLBZN8

If I should stay
I would only be in your way
so I'll go
but I know I'll think of you every step of the way

And I will always love you
will always love you
You my darling you

bitter sweet memories
That is all I am taking with me so
Good-bye
please don't cry
we both know
I'm not what you you need

And I will always love you
will always love you

I hope life treats you kind and
I hope you have all you dreamed of
And I wish you joy and happiness
but above all of this
I wish you love and

I will always love you
Will always love you
I will always love you

2008-05-13T23:49:00.054+08:00

okays this is waywayway overdued=/ haha okays i think i mentioned we went to clarke quay last friday to chill after exams, the sec 4e1ers=D so, i've finally uploaded (after much complaints) the pics of that day! =D

OUTING 9 MAY 08

yup first, we went to plaza sing for dinner! also managed to visit adeline and vinnie at the plaza sing babw branch! yup and we got suhui's present and liy's present there! =D oh and shao and i bought mini-bunnies! =D haha hers is called mini, mine's called baby=D

shao and i!

haha she made them erm.. kiss=/

mini and baby!

liy and her white tiger lemah!

she named it lemah cause it's her 5th!

my lovelies=D

yawen, shao, liy, qiu and me!

haha finally get to meet up!

at burger king=D

gorgeous qiu=)

our first stop at clarke quay: the tapas tree!

the windows=D

tealights on the tables=D

my dearest=D

shao qiu and i=D

haha liy popped in suddenly!

ah ha us 5! dunearn 4e1'04!

martinis and a mocktail=D

my cosmopolitan martini=D

cheers! (check out liy's green tea bottle!)

we decided to try a fresh pose=/

sweet eh!

liy can't drink alcohol!

i love the ambience there=D damn cosy=D

baby drinking martini!

i bunned up her ears!

love my girls=D

with lemah and baby=)

som potato in spicy tomato sauce dish:) nice!

love the ambience!

liy and yawen went off first, shao qiu and i went to our next stop, FASHION BAR! haha=D

with suhui's gift=)

i had a white russian there, it's a drink that mixes coffee with milk and alcohol, recommended by martin (who i bumped into!)

i look tired alr!

after fashion bar, we went back home to slp=D

yup on sat went to shop awhile with qiu and dada, ate at hip diner's and caught 'over her dead body' wih them +goldfish, qiu's friend=D

at hip diner's=)

dada refused to pose for the camera so i snapped anyway:)

our fruity freeze! resembling our martinis=/

slurp!

sun, went strolling around with qiu at city hall, and met with yawen after at west mall:)

got qiu 'love' to cheer her up

love and baby=)

haha matches yawen's top=)

mon qiu came to my place to steam:) cooked lunch for her! haha instant noodles=/

with prawn balls, crabstick, and veg:)

tues was shopping day again at city hall:) marina square first:)

tried this dress from zara:) liked it!

another colour:)

haha erm that's my shopping for the day:)

okays realy tired now.. gg to sentosa tmr so shall update another time!

2008-05-13T10:42:00.002+08:00

was listening to this long that really touched me... kinda describes how i feel now... sigh... oh well.. qiu and i are both single together now... at least we have each other to depend on.. qiu muct hang in strong ok? 1 month! sigh why is love so painful? all those sweet dramas are just a bunch of stories that can never come to pass in real life.. i guess.. after all these i've become a really cynical person.. i don't really believe in much goodness anymore..

if you want to listen to the song, click here:http://www.imeem.com/rainiev/music/Ge0RUt7-// (provided you're signed in to imeem)

手放开 by 李圣杰

我把自己关起来只留下一个阳台
每当天黑推开窗我对着夜幕发呆
看着往事一幕一幕
再次演出你我的爱

我把电视机打开听着别人的对白
也许那些故事可以给我一个交代
你要的爱我学不来
眼睁睁看情变坏
人怔怔看情感概

不能给你未来我还你现在
安静结束也是另一种对待
当眼泪流下来伤已超载
分开也是另一种明白

我给你最后的疼爱是手放开
不要一张双人床中间隔着一片海
感情的污点就留给时间慢慢漂白
把爱收进胸前左边口袋
最后的疼爱是手放开
不想用言语拉扯所以选择不责怪
感情就像候车月台
有人走有人来
我的心是一个站牌
写着等待

我把收音机打开听着别人的失败
啃咽的声音仿佛诉说着相同悲哀
你的依赖还在胸怀
我无法轻易推开
我无法随便走开

感情中专心的人容易被伤害

2008-05-10T22:52:00.002+08:00

EXAMS are OVER!!

haha yeap went to clarke quay to meet old sec sch friends=D went to tapas tree first, beautiful ambience=D and then to fashion bar=D oh and met long-lost martin as well! =D haha chilling and chatting, so relaxing=D

tdy was my last tuition session before we break-ed for a few weeks=D and.. oh yup, went to cine tdy, ate at hip diner and caught 'over her dead body' ! damn funny show =D haha also got to know jingyi, (aka goldfish) hence dropping the count by 1=D 8 more to go! haha qiu lo, snap fingers then queue starts to build up alr=/

okays quite tired.. tmr got meeting then working... so shall upload the pics another day! =D

2008-05-06T21:21:00.003+08:00

ahhhh!!! i just completed going through the answers for lecture 8 only!! still have abt... 4 more lecture answers to go through? plus... i just read... don't know if what i've read stays in my brain=/ everything looks foreign, like the first time i'm seeing them! oh shucks. aiya who ask cecilia so boring, none of us attend lectures. even if we do, we can't absorb anything cause she simply reads from the slides.. hence, while the paper requires us to give many examples to back up our strategies and reasonings, we havent got any at all!! i've already surrendered my text book to the table. not enough time left alr=/ sigh... it's alrleady so late and we're still mugging at bucks. liy and dada have gone home, only qiu and me left struggling to make the most of whatever time's left. this place will close in abt.. an hour's time? shucks=/

oh well, back to mugging! hopefully i can finish lecture 9 before i leave=/

2008-05-06T20:01:00.002+08:00

I Bruise Easily

My skin is like a map

Of where my heart has been

And I cant hide the marks

Its not a negative thing

So I let down my guard

Drop my defences down by my clothes

I'm learning to fall

With no safety net to cushion the blow

I bruise easily

So be gentle when you handle me

Theres a mark you leave

Like a love heart carved on a tree

I bruise easily

Can't scratch the surface

Without moving me underneath

I bruise easily

I found your fingerprints

On a glass of wine

Do you know you're leaving them

All over this heart of mine too

But if I never take this leap of faith

I'll never know

So im learning to fall

With no safety net to cushion the blow

[Chorus]

Anyone who can touch you

Can hurt you or heal you

Anyone who can reach you

Can love you or leave you

So be gentle...

[Chorus]

I bruise easily

2008-05-06T17:30:00.002+08:00

at bucks mugging now.. oh gosh marketing is like so damn boring=/ zzz... making me fall asleep... didn't print out the past year exams ans so i'm viewing them on my laptop now... wah but damn sleep inducing. haha liy and i went on a random tiny spree again=) but of course because we had $40 discount voucher=D haha!

hmmm okay i'll go back to mug, cannot slack too long, paper tmr morning=/ shucks i'm so screwed=/

2008-05-05T23:01:00.002+08:00

wanted to upload pics of ytd and today! haha but lazy... maybe another day=D

news flash: todday 5 staff including our chief manager transferred from suntec to plaza sing outlet=( sigh.. i'm the only pioneer batch staff left...=(

tdy got body shop sales at the atrium=D haha we bought some damn cheap and good stuff=D like the lipstick was erm a quarter of the original price? lol=/ and the lady did a makeover for qiu! haha i'm too lazy to upload the pics now eh=S

yup, some time last week before com law paper i think, qiu and i wrote a list of things we want to do after the exams=D haha eat your heart out! (:

THINGS TO DO AFTER THE EXAMS

1) continue with dance classes (hiphop and streetjazz)
2) go on a holiday!! (maybe to thailand!)
3) learn Japanese!
4) learn driving (for me)
5) rent a car for a day and go for a spin!
6) go clubbing and pubbing with friends
7) do hair steaming
8) test our alcohol limit (with caution of course)
9) watch 5 movies back to back!
10) find a ***** (censored for erm... haha certain reasons)
11) go sentosa tanning! (for her lah i'm dark enough alr, prob tan with sunblock on=/)
12) play volleyball at the beach!
13) bake a cake!
14) go shopping!!! but of course! GSS eh!
15) dress up prettily for the fun of it=)
16) gym and work out!
17) go to underwater world!
18) have a BBQ!
19) book a chalet!
20) prank call ***** (censored again=/ : her idea!)
21) make a voodoo *****(censored again=/ : her idea!)
22) learn karate!! haha!
23) do charity like volunteer trips
24) search for estee lauder products
25) join a slimming program! (burn exam-induced fats=/)
26) nail spa~
27) experiment with different make-up looks!

haha that's it for now i guess=D prob might have more to add! haha can't wait for exams to be over!

sigh... need to mug... seriously screwed for mkting and accts=(

love

2008-05-04T00:37:00.003+08:00

what is love?

a fleeting moment of intense attraction?
a deep trough of tangling emotions?
a strongest belief in everything relatable?
an everlasting longing?
a constant struggle to happiness?
a mission to bring joy and hope?

how many of us, truly know what love is?

when we think we're in love.. is it mere attraction, interest, infatuation, or a maturing crush? when do we know we crossed that line of all-but-love to the realm of true love?

love is selfless, love is pure. love seeks no evil, love believes.

but how do you know.. if what you have is love?

when time and tide passes, will your 'love' age with you? in moments of tribulations, will the tests weigh you down? if we had a barometer, would your love be over the last mark? but i had a bucket, will your love spill over?

even if you know or think you know love, how do you know the other truly loves as well?

does love seek an equal reciprocation? or does it cover all? to love an unloved, to love and not be love, to never have love, to never be loved. which is the worst of all?

many times i have posted on love, 1 cor 13.

but truly, the meaning of it eludes me.

where does love end and duty begin?
where do sacrifices end and judging begin?
where does happiness end and pain begin?

how do you love and not love the right way?
how do you know if the way you love is the way the other wants to be loved?
if not, would you change the way you love?

is love domineering or supportive? forceful in decisions or advisory and supporting?

what is love?

enlighten me please.

2008-05-03T17:32:00.002+08:00

okays, was mugging again at starbucks on thurs.. this is my new friend, dada=D haha ! 9 more to go!

haha qiu and i have a new resolution: to make 10 new friends by end july!

dada!

law paper ytd! haha open book exam. see our books and notes, flag until so colouful=/

haha after sch, we went to watch ironman! =D haha not bad lah the show=D i like his armour=D

haha oh and ytd, we had the wildest idea=D we decided to go on our first pubbing trip=D at clarke quay=)
liy came to help me doll up=D

at chinese gardens mrt waiting for qiu
haha she's a knock-out!

well.. cause we were both in extreme highheels, we decided not to take the train or walk, but instead we took cab over=D haha it's spoil ourselves day!! haha yup and we have the male accompanient of the night -dada! haha he's damn lucky right? lol=D

first stop: yoshinoya=D haha! must have dinner first mah! lol=D encountered a bunch of indonesians!! haha but dada can understand=)

next stop: the CLINIC!

hottie qiu=D

haha our vodka was served in syringes in a cold bucket=/

haha yes it looks kinda wrong=/

inject the vodka! =/
haha that's what we had: the X-nurse's party=D
haha having fun!
the "chair" we're sitting on is actually a hospital bed!! lol.. well at least we weren't sitting in the wheelchairs=D

haha hanged around for awhile then we moved on to HOOTERS! haha the girls there are damn damn damn hot! lol tight tops, damn short shorts and long hair! haha i could tell dada was trying not to stare!! =D

@ hooters=D

her hoota-rita and my frozen margarita=D

after that we went to stroll stroll along clarke quay, and cabbed over to esplanade the riverside... and ... went to harry's bar=D first time i tried martini! lol=D haha we slacked there for damn long, counting down to ryan's msges=D haha!

at harry's

dry martini

dada acting cute! haha see my terrible aiming=/

well the narcissist obviously was taking alot alot of self-potraits but she didn't send me any of hers so i can't upload=/ haha but well, at least she's a drop-dead gorgeous narcissist, so her self-potraits are actually prett decent=D haha!!=D

when i got home! at 3 plus am...i was horrified to see myself in th mirror..look at my terrible eye bags=/ all the fault of exams =/ making me lose precious beauty sleep=/

haha okay i just finished 5 hours of tuition, damn tired. gg to meet qiu to mug for marketing!! haha i havent even touched a single thing, so screwed=/

2008-05-01T00:44:00.000+08:00

MY 20TH BIRTHDAY!!

29 APRIL 2008

my family counted down with me to my birthday!! =D

2 big candles=( i want 20 small candles lah!

i look so damn tired... see my eye bags=(

morning wake up, dress meimei to go... starbucks to mug=(

nice?

but i think it's quite a dull bday outfit=( no choice. didn't go shopping=(

along came the daring who made my dull day better=)

my most beloved!!
haha we were DAMN SLEEPY=( really!!
at cafe cartel=)

haha we actually went for the breakfast. got fooled. they only served breakfast on weekends=(

i love her loads!!

My everlasting shoulder to lean on=)

tweety bday cake!!
haha so cute!! kawaiiiii!!!
qiu posing proudly with the present she wrapped=)
haha but really damn cute!
haha i still look tired!

haha they wrapped the gifts so colourfully=)

haha they got me headphones!! i've been wanting and searching for the perfect one for ages! and they found it=D haha and erm big cartoon paperclips, and oh yes, this belt from esprit i saw last week=) damn cute and colouful=D haha love it! oh and liy got me a book of piano scores of some of my favourite songs=D ah after exams can play new songs!! =D thanks liy!! haha i love everything=D

haha little boy trying to scare us!

went for dinner with family at ichiban sushi=) yumyum=) eat alotalotalot!! haha~

after that, met up with eunice jo and qiu (again=/) haha!

we were at kopi roti at first, but was damndamndamn smoky=/ so went to eunice's house instead where the air was comparatively cleaner=)

2 big candles also=/ i want 20 small candles!! =/
haha bt damn gorgeous and damn nice=)

making my wish=D

long long wish~
blow out the candles!
cut the cake!
ah nice=D
eunice me and jo!

jo qiu me and eunice=D
haha dunearn 1e1-4e1 ' 04!!
miss them so much=D

today was back to mugging=/ same place, same subject=/

my hair is still long! i thought it was cut damn short! qiu decided to proof to me once and for all its is still long and curly enough=)
oh yup. this is april btw
given to me by my student huiqi!! =D haha she named it April=D

gave tuition tdy, my dear followed me home to mug in my bedroom while i tuitioned in the study room. of course, i made 'regular checks' on her to ensure she was 'mugging' =D haha!

then after that we left tgt=D

some pics we took er... on the TRAIN! =D

took me many tries before i could aim right=/ and she decided not to smile when i finaly got it=/
haha bad aiming! ah this is considered good alr actually!
haha pretty 'act-cute' qiu=D

yup so went to meet my acjc friends=D chunpin, sarah yan and grace=D

ate at fish and co=D yumyum=D

mouse cake that they got me!
gift from grace=D
went to chill after at coffee bean!
grace, chun, me and sarah!

see my aiming is better=D haha i refuse to pose the one where i snapped off half chun's and sarah's heads=/

haha thanks for coming down to celebrate for me girls!!

ah i love my girls=D

i'm OLD already!! =(((((

haha thanks for a wonderful bday guys=D i'm really happy=D

okays damn tired. shall go sleep... mugging tmr on labour day again=/

2008-04-30T00:10:00.002+08:00

okay.. i'm officially 20 now=(

haha spent my birthday studying law... i can't believe it=(

okay damn tired. com not working, can't upload pics.

my ipod is spoilt!! damn thing refuses to sync with the computer=( sigh.. and my warranty has expired..=(

feel like getting the red ipod... maybe a bigger memory. now mine's 4GB but not enough alr=(

haha i'm sick and tired of my current one constantly breaking down=( and now i can't send it to repair also cause must pay=(

oh well.. shall update tmr.. too tired now... zzz...

2008-04-28T23:28:00.001+08:00

okays i'll be turning 20 in er.... less than an hour plus!! omgosh=/ so old alr!!!! =/

haha spent tdy with qiu and liy at bucks again=D feel so much freeer and released.. thanks so much for setting me free last night=)

haha we took alot alot of silly pics tdy=D and obviously, not much mugging was down again=/ haha oh and qiu was being a total narcissist tdy=/ she took like...20 pics of herself ? lol =D pity i don't have any of them!

haha i can't get enough of the gorgeous roses!

i'm turning 20!!

haha the mess on our table is oh-so-understated=/

as you can see, qiu's bag is there but she's not there! the slacker=/

in the sunlight!
me with TIGAR!
love liy!!
haha i like the sunlight effect!!
she's glowing=)

while demonstrating to qiu her narcissistic actions=/
awwwww.....
haha my hair's damn messy=/
qiu refused to take me!! haha cause i called her a narcissist=D but she was what!! taking multiple pics of herself nonstop eh!=D
sunlight so bright=D haha sun setting=)

narcissist and me=D
haha scrunch nose!
ugllyyyyyy
even more uglyyyyy!!
haha she's showing off her new scarf-band=D

sweetness=D
i love her!
haha more retarded faces!
haha we really took alot of pics right?
ah that's my bag on my lap, i'n attempt to hide the tummy=D

haha i so love my girls,

they make life worthwhile(:

2008-04-27T21:30:00.004+08:00

yup my pics still arent posting well=/ so er after trying to expand them they're a bit out of shape=/ haha..

met him.... gave me alot of things that surprised me greatly... thanks so much for the bday presents and all..i really appreciate it... i really regret that we can't remain friends..but i guess.. this is really for the best.... just be strong ok? you'lll always be remembered... and i know... you'll be able to pull through this... just remember the good times and keep them as happy memories.. i don't blame you for anything.. if it's anyone's fault it's mine, cause i'm just too tired to carry on anymore.. i'm sorry i can't give you another chance.. i'm really just exhausted... take care okay? i really hope you'll meet someone better..~

well... so west coast park was extremely hot! dad sent us over=D haha hazel was so so excited! she's so adorable=D haha luckily brought her out to a fresh new place=D

haha we took turns walking her=) the park isn't very big... and very sunny[/

oh yes!! saw people playing ultimate frisbee also.. haha qiu and i were tempted to join!! lol but we're no longer in frisbee=(

thanks so much qiu and dada for always brightening my day=D love you guys lots=D

me with hazel!

haha she was so tired she ko-ed on the way back

birthday present: 20 roses for my 20th birthday

biggest (and only) bouquet i've ever received! lol

i've named it TIGAR=D

THANKS so much... i really feel so much better after the convo... i'm glad things are finally working out... thanks so much for your understanding and efforts.. =D

2008-04-27T11:41:00.001+08:00

zzz... it's going to be another long day... hopefully we'll be able to mug today.. change of plans... since ryan couldn't make it we're taking hazel instead!! haha she so deserves to go out and have some fun! poor creature's been cooped up for so many days already=(

yup, and cause we're afraid she might struggle travelling the distance to the east, we decided to take a journey to the west instead=) haha west coast park! plus there's a huge mac there to mug at=) hmmmm...

zzz i'm so sleepy.. didn't get much sleep.. after we hung up.. i think i cried myself to sleep... and.. woke at 7..=/ my alarm wasn't due to ring until almost 3 hours later=/ sigh... oh well.. spent the morning teaching my mum how to hula and playing every song i know on the piano=) haha great way to kill time! =D

mugging a little now with dada while waiting for qiu to end her tuition so we can leave=)

zzzzzz so sleepy!

2008-04-27T00:11:00.002+08:00

met with qiu,and of course, no mugging took plac.e don't know why i even bother to bring any mugging materials out=/ we spent 6 hours emo-ing..

sigh... i'm really at a loss..... i can't concentrate on anything... and i'm afraid to see you later...

2008-04-26T13:44:00.002+08:00

zzz so tiring! haha had a double sibling tuition earlier=) haha damn entertaining though watching sister and brother throw sarcastic and subtly snide remarks all through the hours=) haha next pair in coming soon!! ah ha oh well since i can't study might as well earn money. the sessions i gave for today wll earn me abt... 200? haha oh well. terms almost up and i need to quickly raise money for school fees for sem 3=/

whoa so scary. almost 1/3 of uni life is over!!

need to think of a lists of things to do during the hols to entertain myself with otherwise i'll really get bored out..

zzz at least i'll be meeting my dear qiu later after tuition=)

2008-04-25T22:34:00.002+08:00

still wasn't feeling so good today.. woke up with head feeling damn heavy.. eyes soggy and feeling old and diminished..

went to jurong point to meet liy and qiu... i'm so glad to have them around otherwise i'd really break... thanks so much my loves for all your support.. we went to toysrus first for a stroll-through=) haha and... started gym exercises with the hula hoops there! haha i've never been able to hula! but can imagine how long we were trying i actually got it!! lol.. our hoops got water inside=D yup so in the end qiu and i got one to practise on and hopefully reduce the bulge of our tummies(not that she has one! she's absolutely flat at her tummy area!)

haha i know, random people doing random things! so we ended up gg for lunch and walking around everywhere with hulas=D oh yup mine's called HULA, qiu's one is called HOOPS. haha!!! i named them!! spastic=D

went to coffeebean supposedly to mug but cause of all the problems still looming overhead, qiu and i still cannot bring ourselves to mug.. ended up singing to the ipod songs and laughing and joking. we were kinda desperate to feel good i guess... was supposed to catch a movie with dada too but in the end.. random people of the world decided to take SINGING AT COFFEE BEAN TO A WHOLE NEW LEVEL! haha by... gg to KBOX! lol

i k-boxed exactly 2 weeks ago only with my sim friends! lol.. and.. it's alr been a week since camp ended.. time flies=(

haha so we sang till our hearts content=) unfortunately, no mugging took place=/ after kboing i went to met my jc friends for dinner.. chunpin, sherwyn, shuang ai, myron and joe. haha the guys are CRAZY drivers=) haha i survived the ride!

zzz i'm really sleepy! tuition tmr... oh yup desiree quit alr, but now i have a new student! haha he's shwu boon's brother..ming zhou! good good.. help to occupy my time so i won't think so much.. will be seeing ALL my students tmr.. zzz so i'll be sleeping soon otherwise no energy..

sigh i havent been mugging at all.... will fail my papers=(

okays i'm damn tired... gg to sleep alr...

2008-04-24T23:20:00.002+08:00

realy great track that i keep playing...

当世界不知不觉的变了 When the world changed unknowingly
有时候我怀念以前的我 Sometimes I miss the way I used to be
作的梦虽然远远的 Even though my dreams are far fetched
想像是一种快乐 Just thinking about it is a kind of happiness

拥有了同时也失去什麼 After gaining something, what have I lost at the same time?
而眷恋原来会带来软弱 And longing for love will actually bring out my weakness
你让我在雾里成熟 You’ve allowed me to grow up in the mist
心开始曲折 My heart starts to feel complicated

我不想舍得不想懂得 I don’t want to let go, I don’t want to understand
是谁惹谁言不由衷 Regardless of who provoked who, we didn’t mean it in our words
说谎伤害都是不安犯的错 Hurting each other with lies, is all due to our feeling of insecurity
怕抱不紧什麼 Because we are afraid of not being able to grasp something

我不想舍得不想懂得 I don’t want to let go, I don’t want to understand
谁说割爱才更深刻 Who said that giving up your love will be more memorable?
彼此依赖是爱不是负荷 Relying on each other is love not burden
互相照顾就是幸福的 Caring for each other is happiness.

sigh... my head feels heavy.. i'm so so tired...

2008-04-24T21:22:00.003+08:00

oh yup, i wrote a mini-song few days ago~ haha its supposed to be a full song but i kinda got music-blocked=/

Lose the pain.

the phone becomes silent, your voice disappears
absense grows no fondness, it acts like a curse
you upped the stakes, i can't concentrate
memories of us, by the winds disperse

in anger you turned, your back facing me
all that i'm doing, it's not what you want to see
the final blow came, there's no one to blame
all i want now is to flee and be free...

ineedtobeoccupied.

2008-04-24T21:20:00.001+08:00

yay first paper was over yesterday!!! BYE MACRO E!! =D

haha didnt really study much for it cause was damn tired.. and moody=( sigh..

it's all over already... from yesterday after the paper... got dumped=(

guess it's my fault.. i'm really too tired to try anymore also... we're just 2 very different people trying too hard to fit together.. and i really don't have the confidence and strength to take it anymore.. i can foresee all this repeating again and again..and its really really tiring... maybe, we just arent right for each other.. sigh okays shan't say anymore..

hmmm my 20th birthday is looming ahead, don't want to turn 20!! so old already=(

hmmm oh yup after the paper ytd was girls day outing=D feeling down so cabbed to vivo, went to visit Adelina=D and we ate superdog!! haha the girls bought me a rose also! haha i named it ROSIE!! lol=D and then qiu and i went to catch forbidden kingdom=D haha kinda cute lah seeing all the chinese actors speak english=D

after the show, went to C-town for awhile for qiu to pick up a cheque, and then we headed to to clarke quay to chill at tcc... and to central to shop!

qiu dear don't be sad, i love you!! thanks for accompanying me too=D really feel better with you around=D hugs~ hope you enjoyed yourself too!

haha although i'm facing a broken relationship, i happen to be doing alot of counselling! lol irony of ironies.

oh yup and forgot to mention.. cause on mon both qiu and i were so moody, we went to get a hair-job=D liy did treatment, qiu did treatment and permed, i trimmed my long locks away, did treatment and re-permed! haha cause after trimming the long locks off my hair wasnt curly anymore=/ haha but i like the new hair even though i permed from root it's more wavy and hmm.. light?

sigh... just so tired of everything now.. trying to get my mind of things cause i really can't concentrate to mug... like for econs i hardly studied.. it's lucky i took econs at jc or i'd really be screwed=/

i can't seem to sleep well.. keep waking up alert in the middle of the night, and i have no appetite whatsoever=( oh well then again it could be a good thing, i'm not exactly slim=/ haha=/

so... i'm trying to spend all my time with my friends so i won't be stuck stoning and moody=/ spending my days with qiu mostly, giving tuition over the weekend, and studying (if only). i really don't want to screw up finals!

haha okay i don't know what to say alr...

oh yup, just want to say, thanks for your help, you really helped clear the dark clouds from my days.. i'll try to be happy=)

2008-04-20T23:39:00.001+08:00

i think this song suits my current situation better.. =( sigh..

你最近不说话
怎么了为什么
是不是有什么事让你不快乐
听说你最近很孤单
有点乱有点慌
可是我却不能够在你的身旁

你想要的
我却不能够给你我全部
我能给的
却又不是你想要拥有的
我们不适合也不想认输
好几次我们抱着彼此都是想要哭

你常解释这样的一切都只是开始
我觉得是所有的一切早就已结束
不想再约束不要再痛苦
下一次会有更好的情路

爱我却不能够给你我全部
我能给的却又不是你想要拥有的
我们不适合也不想认输
好几次我们抱着彼此都是想要哭

你常解释这样的一切都只是开始
我觉得是所有的一切早就已结束
不想再约束不要再痛苦
下一次会有更好的情路
这一次我们都能很幸福

2008-04-20T23:25:00.002+08:00

been listening to some chinese love songs.. thought this was very very sweet~

but... doesn't really fit my situation now=/

it' s called ti amo..

雖然是簡單的形容

雖然是重複的動作

因為有你讓一切都變成不平凡

好想縫合妳我手心就這樣牽住放不開

有妳陪伴呼吸著有你的空氣就是幸福

Ti Amo Te Quiero

每一天都要愛上你

想著你沉入夢境

一張眼一清醒第一個想到又是你

sa lang hae and I love you

我每天都要愛上你 (都要愛上你)

少一天 (少一天])就會遺憾 (woo hoo)

陪著你的光陰怎樣都不算蹉跎

好想縫合妳我手心就這樣牽住放不開

有妳陪伴呼吸著有你的空氣就是幸福

Ti Amo Te Quiero

每一天都要愛上你

想著你沉入夢境

一張眼一清醒第一個想到又是你

sa lang hae and I love you

我每天都要愛上你 [都要愛上你]

少一天 (少一天) 就會遺憾 (woo hoo)

陪著你的光陰怎樣都不算蹉跎 (都不算蹉跎)

陪著你的光陰永遠都覺得不夠

went out mugging with qiu tdy, talked alot, mugged some, shopped a little. saw the bioskin ambassador aileen something. she's damn skinny=/ like skin and bones =/ well retail therapy helped out a little i guess.. qiu's really down so i'm glad she felt better.. sigh.. so tired of everything... really really tired..

no mood to mug really.. keep thinking alot.. and i just feel sad constantly.. luckily there's qiu and dada to make me feel better..

i'm turning 20 in... 9 days... sigh i don't want to grow old... =(

so many things i want to do still...

i just want to do well in my studies for now.. just can't focus on mugging.. sigh.. trying to kkeep these problems out of my head... it's just too painful to think about..

sec 3 camp

2008-04-19T11:31:00.004+08:00

Just returned on thurs night from dunearn's sec 3 camp 2008!!

was great=) i took group 8 (Lam Joi-Shan) with Josephine, Danielle and Winandar=)

haha damn enthu bunch=) first night's night outing they practically dragged me around=) haha cheered me to endure on.. since the prize was to eat at the food court there, and i havent had dinner, so they wanted to win so i could eat=) haha damn cute=) ah i love running camps=) although its usually the same things, rock-climbing, kayaking, abseiling, high elements, challenge pole, zip line~

first night i had to scold the buddygroup though=( cause they were super uncooperative.. but they were okay after that la~

hmm for camp performance my group combined song with dance~! 2 guys strummed the guitar , a 'choir' sang 'that thing you do' and the rest danced to their singing=) damn nice=) haha i think the funniest part was when they kept 'flying kite aeroplanes'=D cause camelot there alot of planes flying past, then they will pretend they're flying their kites=)

haha in the end, our group won best group, best campfire performance and.. the best camper was Ashri from our group!! haha TURKEY!

2008-03-25T22:28:00.000+08:00

havent blogged in the longest while! been so busy twith school and all the mid-term papers , plus my work and tuition classes=/ it's extremely draining..

hmmm very quickly, march is coming to an end already... almost a quarter of year 2008! i feel like i'm aging pretty fast=/

oh okay, some new stuff - began taking dance classes at studio wu, my favourite being street jazz and hmmm hip hop i guess=)

been having mid-terms for 6 weeks in a row! =/
zzz so i feel like i'm been migging non-stop for exams...

haha i don't know what to blog abt! it's been such a long time=( i always want to upload pics but it keeps failing! i think i'll try doing it on my laptop in sch one day=/ when i'm finally free=/

oh yes! i want to learn driving soon! and hopefully my parents will buy me a car after i pass! =) haha i want a car! then i no need to suffer from terrible bus-waits, pukish journeys, intolerable trasits and sardine-thick rides..

ah and learn jap too!

ah okay, need to get back to project and mugging for paper on thursr!

2008-02-07T12:35:00.000+08:00

happy lunar new year!!

haha i've been so so busy! with work, new year preps, tuition, SHOPPING, and meeting old friends! =D

haha and of course, spending alot of quality time with my baby=D

i've been trying to upload pics,but not successful at all=/ weird=/

well, i sure hope things go smoothly for the coming year!

2008-01-21T23:07:00.000+08:00

to wish for the moment again.

don't we all do that? moments we had that remain etched forever and we just want to relive them? so many things, i regret not cherishing earlier... now, i just don't want to live with any more regrets...should i go for what i really want? or not, for the sake or others , or for my own good? controversy at its highest, i miss those moments..but to relive them, would be an impossible dream..one that haunts, its traces though faded, never erased..

2008-01-19T00:33:00.000+08:00

went iceskating tdy!!! =D haha or ytd rather, since it's alr past 12am=/

yup supposed to meet gary qiu and liy at 11 plus, but only woke up at 11plus when they called cause i havent reached=/ oops=/ alarm never go off=/

been a year plus since i ice-skated! fell down twice=/ first time, some young girl doing the backwards spin hit me and i fell hard on my knee and slided a bit, so there's a bump eith cuts on it and it was bleeding quite a fair bit.. but qiu and liy helped me wash the wound and plastered it.. second time, i just slipped lo and bruised the other knee=/

oh well... but fell very very sick tdy=/ runny nose and sore throat=/
and i've got tuition and work tmr!! =(

2008-01-13T23:53:00.000+08:00

oh man, i've been so busy! happy 2008!!!!

to kick start the year, i helped out with the sec one orientation taught them the mass dance - pump it=D c helped out with emerald and diamond group more... their dance was created by their damn pro SLs and the class members! damn cute kids! so small but WOWW dancers! like small peishi who learns ballet jazz and hip hop.=/

oh and got parent's anniversary gift - braun buffel wallet for mum, tie and cuff links for dad.
sch started, damn hectic, tuition resumed full scale, extremely busy preparing notes, zapping my own sch notes and all that...

oh well, damn tired.. just came home from my 4th consecutive closing shift at the shop! =/ but i so love my family there=)

2007-12-30T23:09:00.000+08:00

i don't know what to do anymore.. even blogging and writing how i feel here is wrong... things that are ever so familiar that have been with me for years suddenly become wrong and terrible... i feel like i've been changing so much i'm a different person.. and i feel like i'm in another person's skin.. sometimes i feel numb to myself.. all i know is, everything i've been doing is wrong, and i'm a terrible person... i'm so used to the hurtful remarks i've become numb to them...

is love supposed to make you feel that way?

2007-12-23T22:02:00.000+08:00

tdy's the eve of christmas eve~

havent been to church for a long time..felt awkward being there.. there just isn't any sense of belonging... i just feel so apart.. the drama wasn't too bad, but as with every year, my favourite part was the candle-lighting began.. we were each given an unlit candle at the beginning of the service, and after the drama, they passed the first flame down from the stage and on and on till every one in the audi had their candle lit.. and we sang silent night.. when pastor gave the msg abt darkness in our lives and how God's light can dispel that darkness, i felt light the word was for me.. there's been so so much darkness casting over.. shame, guilt, hurt, incompetency, the list goes on. my soul is tired and drained, but still, i cannot receive the light.. i think i need more rest..

after service, went to vivo to meet qiu jc and xinle.. havent met le for really long time.. even though i had to wait 2 hours for them, it was a good meeting.. we managed to get almost all the presents, save for eunice's.. and they managed to get the various items they required too..

we had a short sitdown after we were tired at gloria jean's and chatted a little..

now i'm faced with a tough decision to make, after being exposed to opinions and various perceptions..

it's good to see him move on..but there's still that tinge of pain when i know he's really gone for good now... was reminded of the immense pain i went through, and i really don't wish to go through it again, because then.. i'll really lose my faith in relationships altogether...

sometimes there are tings i want to say, but i can't bring myself to say.. all just because.. i don't want to stir up any currents now that i've finally achieved a state of small tides... and i just want to ride them soothly and breathe for awhile instead of raking more up..

there's just this overwhelming sense of sadness and darkness inside me now.. and i'm too tired to do anything about it... i've really been trying veryhard, but it doesn't seem to be enough.. and i need to rest for awhile...

2007-12-20T18:56:00.000+08:00

work work work that's all i've been busy with! haha esp since it's the holiday season! oh yes, some interesting things that did happen: 1) i went to the zoo last thurs!! =D it was totally fantastic=D
2) i'm gg to the night safari tmr! oh and ytd while i was working, DJ elliott danker from 91.3fm came down to make a bear=) haha oh well, that's abt the end of it. eh... what else have i been doing? ah... work? =D

oh yes, and i have a new pony caled december! and tdy while i was working this boy (whose aunt works in build-a-bear-US), had 3 animals sent to him! a pony, like mine! and a polar bear and a penguin! so cool! =D ah i like th polar bear! it has amazing texture.. but sadly it will only come in end of next year? hmm..

i'm at shaun's house now, we're cooking diner, of course with giles the master chef around~=D i'm not slacking though, they drove me out of the kitchen cause they wanted me to rest, since i worked this morning=D

oh wells, more updates and hopefully pics up soon! i just can't seem to find the time to log online, what more upload pics=/

oookays! hope you guys are having a better holiday! =D

xoxo, k=D

2007-12-08T16:00:00.001+08:00

havent poseted in so long! been busy working and working and yup all that what nots=/

oh yes, newsflast: i got my hair curled 2 days agi!! haha but it's damn drty now=( shaun says i look like a dog=/ the spaniel i think=/ oh well=/

oh yes and over the weekend (ast weekend) there was this sec 3 leaders activity day which i went for, plenty cool=D taught them themass dance 'pump it'.

haha okay i'm busy wrapping xmas gifts and books (ah-hem!!! *hints at somebody who gave me that menial task=P)

alrights, will definitely update as soon as i can find the time to! plenty of brow-raising pics to upload=D

love you guys!

2007-11-19T21:43:00.000+08:00

my family's in shambles.

mum's just pms-ing everyday... arguments, incessant shoutings, fights between my brother and dad, it's crazy...

that's why i go home so late.. i don't want to see them in this state..
and if i return, everything was just magnify..

nothing's okay..i just want to redrown myself in work again..

2007-11-19T21:13:00.000+08:00

i just keep screwing things up.

i don't know how much i love.

1 cor 13:
Love suffers long and is kind,
love does not envy;
love does not parade itself, is not puffed up;
does not behave rudely,
does not seek its own,
is not provoked, thinks no evil;
does not rejoice in iniquity, but rejoices in the truth;
bears all things, believes all things,
hope all things, endures all things.
Love never fails...

i think... i'm a really sinful person..

and i'm really truly sorry..

2007-11-18T11:05:00.000+08:00

hmmm my com's so laggy, don't think there's any way possible for me to upload any pics! haha been so so busy working and working!! exams ended on the 7th, but i've been working non stop after, i havent been online in ages~ =S

so freaking tired... although work's great, sometimes i just feel like i keep screwing things up... and my manager has very high expectations of me... and we are kinda prone to injuries at work=/ was replenishing stock yytd when i got cut by this sharp-edged carton=/ left quite a deep cut=/

hmmm i watch as my lists of things to do grow and grow, but i can nvr do them... cause i'm busy working.. but they're really shorthanded now, and i need the money to pay for my fees since tuition's kinda slow now.. and so i have to put those non-work stuff behind for now...

17/18 nov. alot of thoughts swam through me, kinda confused abt certain aspects of my life. question myself abt every detail of my life, and whether it was worth the effort. i think, i just need a break from everything for awhile, to be alone. and do things i like, but i can't for now... i don't know how long things are gg to drag... i guess, i'll take a step at a time and see how things unfold themselves...

how long does love last?
when a couple gets tgt, should they be adding joys or adding conflicts?

there's so much to think abt, not so much time.
i don't know what to choose...

when it's not alright, when it's not ok
will you try to make feel better
will you say alright, will you say ok
will you stay with me through whatever
or run away...

i need you to listen...

2007-10-31T01:09:00.000+08:00

argh blogger's weird again, can't upload the halloween pics! haha oh well...

still busy mugging for exams=/ stats ytd was suprisingly easier than expected!! =D finished an hour efore time's up.. more worried for bc now, cause i really don't know what's gg on=/ sigh...

zzz... so so tired.. can't wait for exams to be over!

2007-10-28T13:11:00.000+08:00

from my most beloved:

your guardian angel lyrics~

When I see your smile
Tears run down my face I can't replace
And now that I'm stronger I've figured out
How this world turns cold and breaks through my soul
And I know I'll find deep inside me I can be the one

I will never let you fall
I'll stand up with you forever
I'll be there for you through it all
Even if saving you sends me to heaven

It's ok. It's ok. It's ok.

Seasons are changing
And waves are crashing
And stars are falling all for us
Days grow longer and nights grow shorter
I can show you I'll be the one

I will never let you fall
I'll stand up with you forever
I'll be there for you through it all
Even if saving you sends me to heaven

Cuz you're my, you're my, my true love, my whole heart
Please don't throw that away
Cuz I'm here for you
Please don't walk away,
Please tell me you'll stay, stay

Use me as you will
Pull my strings just for a thrill
And I know I'll be ok
Though my skies are turning gray

I will never let you fall
I'll stand up with you forever
I'll be there for you through it all
Even if saving you sends me to heaven

2007-10-28T12:58:00.001+08:00

over you by chris daughtry, a great track that i feel relates very well now. read into the lyrics!

Now that it's all said and done,
I can't believe you were the one
To build me up and tear me down,
Like an old abandoned house.

What you said when you left
Just left me cold and out of breath.
I fell too far, was in way too deep.
Guess I let you get the best of me.

Well, I never saw it coming.
I should've started running
A long, long time ago.
And I never thought I'd doubt you,
I'm better off without you
More than you, more than you know.

I'm slowly getting closure.
I guess it's really over.
I'm finally getting better.
And now I'm picking up the pieces.
I'm spending all of these years
Putting my heart back together.

'Cause the day I thought I'd never get through,
I got over you.

You took a hammer to these walls,
Dragged the memories down the hall,
Packed your bags and walked away.
There was nothing I could say.

And when you slammed the front door shut,
A lot of others opened up,
So did my eyes so I could see
That you never were the best for me.

Well, I never saw it coming.
I should've started running
A long, long time ago.
And I never thought I'd doubt you,
I'm better off without you
More than you, more than you know.

I'm slowly getting closure.
I guess it's really over.
I'm finally getting better.
And now I'm picking up the pieces.
I'm spending all of these years
Putting my heart back together.

'Cause the day I thought I'd never get through,
I got over you.

2007-10-23T23:58:00.000+08:00

my current favourite song. was passing by ear2 and heard this track playing. was immediately drawn by it and went to purchase the cd immediately! haha the singer's called olivia, a local talent, album's called fall in love with olivia

so here are the lyrics, i can't find the english trnanslation! anyone who can, let me know okay? thanks! =D PS> THE SONG'S THE ONE PLAYING ON MY BLOG NOW!

Koi ni Ochite (fall in love, jap)

Moshimo negai ga kanau nara
Toiki wo shiroi bara ni kaete
Aenai hi ni wa heyajuu ni kazarimashou
Anata wo omoinagara

Darling, I want you aitakute
Tokimeku koi ni kakedashi sou na no
Maigo no you ni tachisukumu
Watashi wo sugu ni todoketakute

Daiyaru mawashite te wo tometa
I'm just woman
Fall in love

If my wishes can be true
Will you change my sighs
To roses, whiter roses
Decorate them for you
Thinkin' 'bout you every night
And find out where I am
I am not
Livin' in your heart

Darling, I need you dou shite mo
Kuchi ni dasenai negai ga aru no yo
Doyou no yoru to nichiyou no
Anata ga itsumo hoshii kara
Daiyaru mawashite te wo tometa
I'm just woman
Fall in love

Darling, you love me ima sugu ni
Anata no koe ga kikitaku naru no yo
Riyote de hoho wo osaete mo
Tohou ni kureru yoru ga kirai
Daiyaru mawashite te wo tometa
I'm just a woman
Fall in love

Don't you remember
When you were here
Without a thinking
We were caught in fire
I've got a love song
But where it goes
Three loving hearts are
Pullin' apart of one

Can't stop you, can't hold you, can't wait no more
I'm just woman
Fall in love
I'm just woman
Fall in love

2007-10-23T23:35:00.000+08:00

yawn... been really busy mugging and working... exams in 2 days! gosh i'm so freaked out=/ mugmugmugmugmug!!

haha tdy at beans was pretty eventful though. stickman was working, so got free latte. then there was travis, ahmad, hidayah, yaya, glenn.. so they were nice lah and chatted with me=D and yuan happened to pop by too, and there was xiu ting too! and i complted my targeted chaps=D finished all the topics with examples and questions done! tmr will be full exam paper and questions day, oh and memorising certain theory day=/

oh and my ipod is back and fully restored!! =D

lol i'm just crapping=/

okay here's a great track, from olivia's album, i'm a fan=D

"The Rose"

Some say love, it is a river
that drowns the tender reed.
Some say love,
it is a razorthat leaves your soul to bleed.
Some say love, it is a hunger,
an endless aching need.
I say love, it is a flower,
and you its only seed.

It's the heart afraid of breaking
that never learns to dance.
It's the dream afraid of waking
that never takes the chance.
It's the one who won't be taken,
who cannot seem to give,
and the soul afraid of dyin'
that never learns to live.

When the night has been too lonely
and the road has been too long,
and you think that love is only
for the lucky and the strong,
just remember in the winter
far beneath the bitter snows
lies the seed that with the sun's love
in the spring becomes the rose.

2007-10-21T00:16:00.000+08:00

i'm such a screwed up person. i just seem to make everyone i love upset at me.

and it hurts so bad.

2007-10-20T23:51:00.000+08:00

i really don't want any conflict... please don't argue for me too okay? it's alright...

i know i shouldn't have posted anything, i'm deleting the post...

i'm really don't want things to escalate any further, please... just stop..

2007-10-20T23:07:00.000+08:00

been so busy mugging i havent been online...
was suprised to see a debate on my tagboard..
one that brought instant tears=(

actually, i just blogged to release my frustrations, and i really had the intention of deleting it the next morn... but it slipped my mind cause i rushed off for work the entire day.. and knocked out the moment i reached home.

i just really want things to be good... somehow, i just felt blamed cause of the immediate "what you wrote was irrelevant" response from them when i saw the group project... didn't occur to me my blog's so widely read, cause usually the tagboard's dusty, and i just simply express my thoughts freely.. seems like, i assumed wrongly.

it's precisely because i value our friendship so much, i just swallowed everything down and not want to face a confrontation... hence i chose the cowardy route of blogging. of course i loved being in a group with my closest pals, after so many years we really can work tgt..

i guess i just snapped inside when i felt blamed somehow by them. cause the closer people are to you, you kinda value what they say even more, read into their words even more...

to liy, i'm sorry you think that way, sorry for thinking too much of your comments, and for causing you disappointment. yeah so i guess i was overly dramatic and emotional. nevertheless, i believe i wasn't entirely wrong either. if you don't agree, it's okay, cause it doesn't matter, it's OVER anyway, and yes, at least we passed that damned ob. we really should focus more on the exams=/

as for anonymous, just FREAKING GET LOST. . i hate GUTLESS CREEPS who tag so critically and yet have NO FREAKING GUTS to leave a name. i got news for you, I'M NOT INTERESTED IN FEEDBACK THAT ARE AUTHORLESS.

and don't assume you know me that well. don't like my posts, DON'T READ them. they aren't for you anyway. you're welcome to continue tagging anonymously with your warped sense of assumptions oif you insist on being childish. in a way, you do help dust my tagboard.

maybe i should just change my blog add again.. i'm sick of having goodness-knows-who people reading.

on a better note, i've been mugging for exams. went to west coast mac tdy with qiu and le.. haha qiu and i were dizzy over accounts=/ but i think we were more or less pdtive.. went to beans after when they were all leaving for dinner to continue mugging.. hmmm i'm on shift tmr=/ oh well.

2007-10-12T13:37:00.000+08:00

yawn... computing is such a killer.

after rushing for 3 days alr, (with consistent work in classes) i'm still not fully done. it gna be due in a few hours!

oh yup, got some results of my first sem alr. sigh didn't do too well. stats: distinction, accounts, High distinction, but ob only credit for individual and pass for group=/ sigh think ob's really tough...

hmmm been quite busy of late, with work and all that i've been having the weirdest dreams! haha like how 2 of the dogs in my shop came to life and became my pets=D

oh and speaking of the shop, it is fully webbed thanks to adelina=D haha we have a serious infestation of spiders! all in the good name of halloween=D

zzz okays back to work=D

2007-10-07T13:31:00.000+08:00

feeling random and since i had like 2 hours to kill before heading to work, i went to update my facebook applications and friendster andyes, my poorly maintained blog=) since i've been busy and lazy of late, havent got much pics uploaded, but i managed to rummage through old folders and came up with old pics i havent posted before (methinks.) =D

this was on qiu's bday=D see the girl grin with exuberating joy when she held up her new CK boxer=D

i love my dear qiu! =D

heh retarded=D

spastism

fion, my og member=D

ghazy!! =D from my og too!

jiaying~ from og too!

met up with dear chunpipn last last wed=D after so long! sat at secret recipe and took all sorts of spastic retarded pics just like old AC days. will upload them soon=D meanwhile the few bites i have on my cam.

sipping iced lemon tea=D she more like GULPED it down=D heheh!

omgdeliiciioussstrawberrycheesecake!

hmmm and i think this is white chocolate macadaemia. mmmmm~

gosh i miss her!

haha this is really old! like one year ago! on rah phua's bday and i koped her balloons=D good ol' mad AC days=D

oh and i think most of you guys know by now what happended to POOR QING. look at him tongue-in-cheek with bandaged leg writhing in pain=D

haha okay that's for now, off to work! =D

2007-10-04T23:35:00.000+08:00

yuo so this song we sang in church had this bridge that really touched me. goes like

heal my heart and make it clean
open up my eyes to the things unseen
show me how to love like you have loved me

break my heart for what breaks yours
everything i am for your kingdom's cause
as i walk from Earth into Eternity.

sigh. sometimes i wonder how 2 christians can do such indespicable stuff.

2 CHRISTIANS. christians who claim they LOVE God.

part of me is still somewhat bitter and resentful. like I WANT VENGEANCE resentful. even though it's been like 2 weeks since i've learnt of it, it still bothers me. i try so hard not to let it affect me, really.

gg to church and cell group is what really keeps me gg. everythime i feel so renwed, like i'm gicen a chance to start over once again. but somehow i always end up messing that chance up=/

sigh there just seems to be a never ending flow of things to be done! zzz...

i'm so sicj of everything, work, tuition, school assignments. i just want to go for a holiday so badly. i just want to be able to have the right mind and time to pick up a pen and start writing songs again. it's already been 4 months since i last wrote...

oh yeah and tdy during cell group, the msg was about servanthood, and then, my leader did the most wow thing. she washed our feet like how Jesus washed His disciples' feet!

hmmm.... i want to go major shopping but i'm broke=/

okay i'm rambling.

hmmm lyrics from this song we sang in cg tdy

GOD OF MY FOREVER

God of my youth i remember
Your call on my life took me o'er
Your love has seen me through all my days
i stand here by Your grace

on this altar i've written my life
tells of the story i have with You my Lord
i want the world to know

God of my forever
and forever i'm with you
my life is saved with a price
Your sacrifice redeemed my soul

God of my forever
and forever i will sing
my greatest honor will always be
to serve my Lord and King.

Nothing matters when you're here with me
in the end just to hear you say "well done"
bowing before your throne

forever and ever
Jesus you alone in glory reign
forever and ever
with you i walk this narrow way~

2007-10-02T12:44:00.000+08:00

zzz i'm so tired... don't know how long i can keep this mad rush up..

so much stuff has been happening, it's really making me drained.

i don't know how to meet you now, i'm not sure if i really want to know what happened between you guys. but from what you guys did, even though it's abt a year ago, it's really hard for me to believe in anything now. when your best friend and boyfriend betrays you right in your face, you just don't know what else to believe in anymore. especially when back in coffee bean i alwasys held you and supported you through your problems, the sleepover muggings and ice cream, the halloween dress-ups, all the anniversary presents i did, all the photos, suddenly everything seems like a blur.

i have so much to deal with alr, i really don't want to have anymore to think abt.

there's so much unsaid and unconfessed. even though i'm not sure how i'd react, i still think i deserve the right to know everything. what do you guys see me as? no one bothered to confess and apologise to me, i had to learn of it somewhere else, just like with joel.. you guys don't seem to respect me, as your girlfriend or best friend. i loved you guys so much.. it just doesn't seem fair that you both can lead such happy lives now, after dumping me aside.. part of me wants some form of vengeance, part of me is too dead and tired to do anything anymore.

did you guys ever thought of how it might affect me? i doubt so..

so many pieces falling into place now, but still so many gaps. i need to know..

2007-09-28T13:36:00.000+08:00

been so so busy i havent logged online since com lab day=/ oh man. hopefully once the final year exams are over, my tuition will slacken and i'll have more time for myself! =D

kayys i'm late for lecture, will upload pics next time=D

2007-09-19T11:21:00.000+08:00

i'm in computing class now!! haha so slack=D computing is the best class ever cause firstly, it's not very sleep inducing, secondly, we get to use PCs =D

okay laters!

2007-09-15T11:46:00.000+08:00

zzz. so much time has passed! was terribly busy and exhausted. after bc was finally handed in, i had stats class. but due to NO SLEEP i was totally gone in class=/ plus my friends abandoned my to solitude=/ and so i struggled even with copying whatever the lecturer was writing, haha, until i realised i was writing CHINESE=/ oh gosh. haha and hence after the break i retired home to die on my bed=D

wed had work, and for the first time, my star ratings are up to 6!!! 6 stars! haha=D but kris' is like 8=/ oh gosh. oh had og outing after to, went to kbox with jiaying, fion, pj, and weiying=D will upload the pics soon=D

thurs went to visit poor QING at his place. haha i think he'd axe me if i typed down what happened to him, but then again, qing, EVERYONE KNOWS ALR!! =D but qing sure has one cool room, with a spiral staircase IN his room up to another private room. how cool=D

eh heh. ytd i went to town again! it's a record. i havent been to town as often in like.... years? haha! went to look for yuan to pass him stuff and collect stuff=D for the first time in months we finally had a decent convo=D made me VERY happy=D haha after that, went to catch RATATOULIE! =D oh and shaun introed me the cafe on the 4th level that has peach smoothie like tcc's 'peach me up'! haha loved the flick, made me laugh a whole lot=D we had a drive around after too=D and again tonned till tdy morn, and went for hotcakes=D haha and tdy's FULL DAY OF WORK! one tutee down, next one arriving in 7 mins, and work at the bear shop after! oh the joys=D

okay shall upload pics and more soon! gta prepare for work and tuition=D

oh and, some SHOUTOUTS

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO! :

HUIXIN! - I REALLY MISS OUR AC DAYS!

DIONIS! -TAKE GOOD CARE OF BUBBLES! =D

ALOYSIUS! - WHOSE BIRTHDAY IS TMR!

ANTHONY! - WHOSE BIRTHDAY'S ON THE 19TH BUT I'M AFRAID I'LL FORGET=/

haha okay, i'm offfffff=D

2007-09-11T00:54:00.000+08:00

yawn... i'm at friend's place now doing bc.. 2nd night we tonned alr! =/ ytd did until 4am. hopefully tdy can go back earlier=/ i'm done alr like finally. left with the printing only... and the burning of the soft copy=/ alot alot alot to print=/ prob gna dry out my entire catridge=/

okay i'm rambling=/ i'm really tired! had night shift work ytd and then did b till 4, and school this morn and bc till now=/ zzz...

i so so want to sleep=/

2007-09-08T23:28:00.000+08:00

i'm so sleepy, in no mood to do bc at all. am just glad that ob is finally over! =D

yawn... oh yes, went to town to catch even almighty with shaun ytd. haha it's a hilarious yet, somewhat pretty meaningful show. ARK- A Random act of Kindness. yup i guess there were somethings i learnt. like when you pray for patience, God doesn't give patience, but rather gives you the opportunity to be patient. and so, i think there was some takeaway from the flick.

tdy had 8 hours straight of tuition. i'm absolutely drained=/

went down to united square to visit the vent too. hmmm not bad lah=D only a little dim, but seems kinda fun! =D

yawn... okay shall upload random pics soon! =D

random pics

2007-09-08T09:09:00.000+08:00

okay shall upload random but still quite recent pics! =D

for those who havent met him, this is my beloved and extremely adorable dimples! =D

awww sleeping in hay=D

last last sunday kor came to church! =D

haha=D

keira in ballerina and wings!

Asia in wedding dress!

nigey the bearemy=D my only bear with a sound!

bear boxers! =D

hello kitty panties! =D

mummy nigey=D

while mugging for accts test=/

liy qiu and me! we bought the same slippers! =D guess which is my foot?

haha the extra pair, jiali's =D

fighter in pirate! arrrghh!!!

my new bear ring!

DIMPLES!!

haha sleeping on his wheel!

my cousin just gave birth to a girl, nicholle! =D

asia in samba=D

asia in hawaii=D

that's it for now! =D

2007-09-06T01:05:00.000+08:00

something sweet my friend typed for me=D

"Many times we see ourselves in depths of life. We look around, only to find that we are alone. We look down, only to know that we are down at the deepest point in life. We look up, only to know that the whole world is on the top. And then we give up. Give up without thinking what we can learn.

We need to know that - only when we have seen the deepest points of life, we would be able to appreciate the peaks of life, what life can offer and what we can possibly achieve.

When we are down, don't give up on yourself. At this moment, every step that you take... lifts you up. It does."

Cheers don be down =),
Shaun

thanks a bunch shaun=D

2007-09-05T23:30:00.000+08:00

ah so sian.need to do ob AGAIN. just want it to be over. one of our members, amal, left the group cause she just received the letter that she's exempted from ob. =(

oh well.

oh yes work on monday wasn't so good cause i was shouted at by this man. cause his daughters were taking pictures of everything in our store, hanging the pc and jamming the sound stattion and banging the pram around. so my manager told me to ask them not to take pics, and she removed the pram. and the father (who was sitting outside the entire time with the mum) came in and started railing at me. i guess i was kinda shocked to be railed at publicly, so i got kinda shaken and er.. broke down a little after? oh man. so embarrasing=/ but i was really quite shaken by that incident=/

school yesterday was boring as usual.

oh tofday the group came over to my place to do ob project. we went swimming after=D damn cool. super relaxing! we swam laps, went to the steam room, bubbled in the jacuzzi and even hit tht slide at the baby pool=D and then back to the steam room to get the heat back on, and went to burn more fats with even more laps=D was reallly refreshing =D we should really chill like this more often!

oh yes, been watching alot of hana kimi too. hmm somehow, it's given me a ideal boyfriend outline. haha like quan! =D nice, considerate, caring and not possessive. and i like the way he talks=D plus he's sporty with good looks and a great body=D and shy=D i think i like introverts more now! =D

yawn so tired. work tmr. though i only have one lecture this week, tuition slots have been raised from 7 to 12 cause they're having hols and finals are coming. this means plenty more work to do!

i so want to go for a hol! =D retreat, retreat ;

i miss you.